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How Far is too Far? God's love reaches all- growing means thinking outside the box... love one another |
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kissing and holding hands would be as far as id go
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Hey Trish, If you ask me that also sounds like some very good advice... thank God for the common sense and wisdom of good moms. I don't know why people have to take something so natural and simple and try to make it into something so wrong and difficult. It's not just okay... it's a very positive thing to think about boundaries and where to draw the line in a relationship. I have always believed moderation is the way to go and a little common sense can go a long way. Are you telling me we don't have to be ashamed and it's okay to actually enjoy being close to the ones we love... wow- what a concept! It is for freedom that Christ has set me free. And it is because I love Him and know He has my very best interests at heart and doesn't want to see me hurt that I live within the boundaries I believe He has for me. This way I do not live by a legalistic set of rules but a freedom to chose to follow Him. It's wonderful!
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Wow - couldn't be in a relatonship without kissing, cuddling, hugging, holding hands, touching...... My guidance for myself and what tell my children is - all the above but never on the bits you cover up with swimming costume!!! Not untl you are married and them - enjoy all of it!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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3/8/2008 9:15 pm |
Sky, I thank you for posing the question. I do agree that it's something that is more than worthy of discussion. And yes, we DO have a choice in the matter; God gave us the choice to have sex, as well as countless other choices. I might remind my more legalistic brothers and sisters: "All have sinned and fall short of the glory of God." (Romans 3:23). In effect, sin is sin. When you gossiped to one neighbor about the other ... that was a sin. When you "allowed" the clerk to give you change you didn't deserve ... sin. When you (and  didn't love God with all our hearts every day ... that was a sin. Point being, REGARDLESS of the sin, we're going to commit multiple ones every day. And to my knowledge, the Bible doesn't have a Sin Ranking System. We might as well have a poll on gossiping, bearing false witness, how to keep the Sabbath holy, etc. Sex just gets so much attention because it's ... well ... stimulating! (pun intended!). So what's a fallable, sinful mortal to do?? I believe we're called to try to live our lives in such a way that maximizes our intimacy with Christ. We can never reach this maximum, but the journey is the thing (sometimes called "life"). And the destination is only made possible through the blood of Christ. Rock on, Sky  I come from a permiscuous past.. so I am not pointing a nasty finger at anyone.... WHAT I AM STATING is THAT living a CHASTE and PURE life is NOT an OPTION in the eyes of GOD... It is of upmost importance.... there is a difference between being a sinner who FALLS and enters SIN... but has a repentant heart and someone who suggests it is a matter of OPINION on how far we are willing to go in an intimate relationship... Sorry but this is one of those topics where it is NOT about OPINION but rather a CHALLENGE to ALL CHRISTIANS to live against the flow of what society does....
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3/8/2008 1:13 pm |
Sky, I thank you for posing the question. I do agree that it's something that is more than worthy of discussion. And yes, we DO have a choice in the matter; God gave us the choice to have sex, as well as countless other choices. I might remind my more legalistic brothers and sisters: "All have sinned and fall short of the glory of God." (Romans 3:23). In effect, sin is sin. When you gossiped to one neighbor about the other ... that was a sin. When you "allowed" the clerk to give you change you didn't deserve ... sin. When you (and didn't love God with all our hearts every day ... that was a sin. Point being, REGARDLESS of the sin, we're going to commit multiple ones every day. And to my knowledge, the Bible doesn't have a Sin Ranking System. We might as well have a poll on gossiping, bearing false witness, how to keep the Sabbath holy, etc. Sex just gets so much attention because it's ... well ... stimulating! (pun intended!). So what's a fallable, sinful mortal to do?? I believe we're called to try to live our lives in such a way that maximizes our intimacy with Christ. We can never reach this maximum, but the journey is the thing (sometimes called "life"). And the destination is only made possible through the blood of Christ. Rock on, Sky
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3/8/2008 9:46 am |
I am the last person who should even have made a comment on this topic in light of my opinon regarding the opposite gender... and I apologize for that... for this reason and because I have at present a STILL pure-hearted and chaste 16 year old daughter.. I take the topic of purity very seriously.... I also see the effects that sex outside of marriage in my younger adult years has damaged my heart and spirit in many many deep ways... and so... today .. I have placed my sexuality in a box.... I have no men in my life.. nor do I wish to ( to be very blunt )...I don't flirt with men.. or send them any kinds of signals to play games with them... and I guess this is what I am seeing alot of in people... even in Christians.. an almost COMPLACENT attitude about relationships... Again.. I ask forgiveness for placing my thoughts in your blog... I will use the excuse that I am very ill right now with bronchitis.. It is the excuse I have been using for 2 days now.. I think I can use it for one more day.. LOL... Bless you....
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3/7/2008 9:25 pm |
Beautiful lady.... I will take your comment as partially if not fully meant for me.. since I am the one who seems to have come across harshly here... I saw your name in my blog... so I will assume that you read atleast a part of my post about my attitude towards men.... I will be the first to admit I am not balanced in this area... and that I am even so UNBALANCED that I can be called EXTREMELY BROKEN ... to dis-like and mis-trust men as much as I do is NOT RIGHT... but it simply is.... This is not the issue anyways.... What shocked me.. and forgive me for coming across so harshly is that you presented the vote as though we have a CHOICE.. and that whatever we decide is to be respected and OK.... This is fine for the non-believer... but truly as Christians... we have STANDARDS set for us via the BIBLE.... With this said... I NEVER judge a person who is living with someone... or who is having sex with someone... that is truly between them and God... but it IS SIN.... It is a choice yes to do whatever one wants when they are dating... INDEED.. it is a free choice.... but anything outside of PURITY between man and woman.... including lustful actions and thoughts is NOT living according to God's desire for us..... The more I type.... the more I seem to be coming across as a self-righteous religious fanatic which I am SOOOOOOOO NOT.... I guess this is a sore topic for me... and I don't see it at all as one that should be viewed as a free for all.. to do as one pleases.... DATING.. and relationships between men and women on ALL LEVELS are to be PURE and RESPECTFUL... so whether or not someone thinks this.. or that.. as is obviously the case from the many opinions you got.... is NOT even important... the question should be..... WHAT DOES GOD THINK.... Are we pleasing HIM.... It bothers me intensely that you have added.. NO one has the right to shame others into silence..... YOU may believe you are right but what may be right for you may not be right for everyone.... ??? We are talking CHRISTIANITY.... the standards of JESUS... they are the SAME for everyone.... who states they are CHRISTIAN...
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3/7/2008 6:27 pm |
Oh my word.. WHY did I bother to come back and check... SHAKING head.... UNBELIEVABLE...... Heavenly FATHER.. forgive us...
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3/7/2008 5:55 pm |
I think if you both are committed to each other, in your hearts and the eyes of God, then your sexual boundaries are your own business.
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3/7/2008 2:34 pm |
Men on one side of the planet ... and women on the other... Do NOT look... talk to... and especially TOUCH them or you will get boy germs... EWWWWW... hahahaha.. sorry... I do not understand why you are posting this pole when it is clearly NOT a matter of choice here... God is very specific about PURITY... before marriage.... it is not a poll.... sadly most people take it upon themselves to take MANY RISKS that lead to sex before marriage... hmmmmmmm this is the second post I have answered about sex today.... I wish people would take PURITY SERIOUSLY... this is coming NOT from someone who is casting stones... as my answer at the top is truly what I think they should do with men.. ahahhha place them across the universe... LOL... but I speak as a woman who has been VERY PERMISCUOUS in my past.... I never did it right..... cuz I was not a Christian....Now that I am a Christian... I no longer to find a mate.. go figure.. lol... Bless you...
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3/7/2008 2:34 pm |
Paul made it VERY CLEAR to Timothy, Concerning these things I have told you (we dont know what was told) It is better for a man to not even TOUCH a woman! Kissing, holding hands, etc,..... outsode the boundries of a Father/Daughter Mother/Son relationship I beleive was meant to be a gift for marriange only! Kissing IS a form of ORAL sex. It doesnt have to be just the "usual parts" If we studied the contect and culture that the bible was written in, we could see that made rules have come into play within Western Christianity and that we are in sin and dont know it! Why not save 100 % of yourself for your future wife/husband? Wouldnt it be nice to know that when you get married, that you know that this person is the ONLY person whom you have ever kissed? When we "make out" with others before marriage, you are actually making out with someone elces future spouce if you two dont get married! Did Jesus ever go around "kissing" a bunch of women before he found "the one?" WWJD?
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