Pebbles in My Shoes Part Two
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Posted:Nov 19, 2009 1:23 pm
Last Updated:Dec 9, 2025 12:22 am 3715 Views
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Pebbles in My Shoes (Part Two) 1 Thessalonians 5:18
In everything give thanks; for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus.
For many years I didn't react well to those nagging little problems-the "pebbles in my shoe." I was used to either calling things "bad luck," getting ticked off, or just shrugging my shoulders while muttering "What's the use?"Then I discovered 1 Thessalonians 5:18, and I began to measure my walk with God by those four simple words: "In everything give thanks." To my amazement, I started to notice a change in my attitude about life in general. I began to realize that God wants to invade every area of my life.
Let me suggest three reasons God commanded us to give thanks in all things:
First, giving thanks in all things expresses faith-faith in the God who knows what He's doing; faith in the God who sovereignly rules in all that happens to us. Isn't that what He wants from us?
Second, He knew we wouldn't do it naturally. Giving thanks in all things means I am no longer walking as a mere man, grumbling and griping, but walking as a spiritual man (see 1 Cor. 2:14,15)-a man who sees God at work...even in the grains of sand that tend to fill my shoes.
Isn't that a little bit of what's wrong with twentieth-century Christianity? Don't we divorce God from the details of daily experience? Don't we ultimately dislike those things that we can't seem to control? Let's be honest, we'd rather gripe, complain and be miserable about circumstances than give thanks.
Finally, God wants to teach us how to deal with the irritating grains of sand so we can get on with climbing the mountains He has for us. All we see are the pebbles, and we think if we could just remove all those pebbles then we could get on with real life. But the pebbles are the real life that God brings us day by day. He wants to use those irritants to instruct us and to see us mature in Christ.
Prayer:
Tell God you want to submit to Him to learn the lessons He has for you in the midst of daily life. Ask Him to teach you through these pebbles that are in your shoes."
Discuss: Do you have some grit and gravel in your shoe that feel like a herd of boulders? Before you try to empty them out, why don't you stop right now and give thanks for that rock pile and ask Him to teach you what you need to learn.
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Pebbles in My Shoes Part One
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Posted:Nov 18, 2009 10:41 am
Last Updated:Dec 9, 2025 12:22 am 5324 Views
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Pebbles in My Shoes (Part One) 1 Thessalonians 5:16-18
Rejoice always; pray without ceasing; in everything give thanks; for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus.
Do you mind if I camp on a verse for a couple of days? First Thessalonians 5:18 demands our attention.Do you ever feel as though the "little" circumstances of life are about to overwhelm you?
It is said we are worn down less by the mountains we climb than by the grain of sand in our shoes. I agree.
Would you like to know what pebbles seem to frequent my sneakers? People who try to make me feel guilty; My unbalanced checkbook; My garage (It continually proves the second law of thermodynamics-the universe is moving from order to disorder.); The incessant ringing of the telephone; Sibling rivalry; A drippy faucet, a smoking fireplace, a leaky pipe in the ceiling; Car problems that always occur at the most inopportune times; A whining ; Things that aren't where I left them, or forgetting where I left them; More sibling rivalry; An unresolved conflict with a family member; Tripping over all the stuff that six can drag out!
Little things get to us-frequently.
Honestly, big problems are difficult, and there are more serious problems that do confound us, but today, right now, this is where I live-in the midst of the little things.
It's called reality. It reminds me of a bumper sticker I saw on a pickup truck some time ago: Reality is for those who can't cope with drugs. I really do understand why we have a culture of "cop-outs."
Is God involved in the details of life? Could God possibly want to teach us something in a flat tire? Does He really want to invade every moment of our days, or would He prefer to reserve the 9:30 until 12:00 time slot on Sunday mornings?
Give thanks-in everything.
Prayer:
Why not bow in prayer right now and by faith give thanks in everything?
Discuss: What little circumstances often cause frustration for you?
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Leave It to Heaven
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Posted:Nov 17, 2009 12:33 pm
Last Updated:Dec 9, 2025 12:22 am 4934 Views
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Leave It to Heaven Romans 12:19
Never take your own revenge, beloved, but leave room for the wrath of God, for it is written, "Vengeance is mine, I will repay," says the Lord.
This classified ad actually appeared in a San Francisco area newspaper:For sale: 1984 Mercedes, 240 SL. Loaded. First $50 takes it. 868-5737.
Not believing his eyes, a man called the number to see if the "$50" was a misprint. A woman assured him it wasn't. So the man rushed to her home and gave her $50 in cash. As she handed him the title to the luxurious automobile he asked the obvious question: "Why are you selling a Mercedes for $50?"
"Well," she explained, "my husband just phoned me from Las Vegas. He's there with his secretary, and he said he's leaving me. He went broke gambling, and he asked me to sell the Mercedes and send him half of what I get for it."
This woman got what she thought was "sweet revenge." Unfortunately, it's a pattern of behavior that often creeps into families that aren't breaking up, as well as those struck by the tragedy of divorce. We justify getting back at people when they take advantage of us. Accounts need to be "evened up."
Why does the Bible challenge such thinking and behavior? Why are we to leave vengeance to God? Because He, not us, is the source of right and wrong. When your mate hurts you, it ultimately wounds God more than you. Furthermore, God is the One who can dispense forgiving grace to you when you hurt your mate.
To take on the right of getting back at others is basically a sign of pride. The apostle Paul's counsel, "Bless those who persecute you" (Rom. 12:14) is followed closely by the command, "Do not be proud" (v. 16, NIV). We dare not clutch for ourselves that which belongs to God.
Punishment belongs to Him. Marriages work better when we leave such lofty matters to heaven.
Prayer:
That you and your mate can develop the humility to be more forgiving toward each other, leaving revenge in the hands of God.
Discuss: What types of offenses typically lead you to seek revenge? How has your mate sought revenge against you?
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Air-Brush Christians
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Posted:Nov 16, 2009 9:46 am
Last Updated:Dec 9, 2025 12:22 am 3730 Views
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Air-Brush Christians James 5:16
Therefore, confess your sins to one another, and pray for one another, so that you may be healed.
Oliver Cromwell, the British statesman and leader of the British Isles, war hero and leader, was posing one day for a portrait. He got up from his seat after the artist had done a great deal of work, and examined it. Then he turned to the young woman and rebuked her, "When you paint me, you paint me warts and all!"The artist had done a beautiful job of painting Sir Oliver, but it was too good. And I think that little story typifies the kind of the air-brush society we live in. Today you can take an unflattering photograph of yourself and have all the "warts" removed. They will fix your lumpy nose, change the color of your eyes, improve your smile and remove any unsightly blemishes-all with either an air-brush or what we call today "computer enhancement"!
We are a culture of fake people: air brushing our lives, creating illusions, never willing to admit our faults to others. And this is often just as true of Christians. Once you know how to talk and relate to other Christians, it's often easy to give them the impression that you are much more mature in Christ than you really are.
The irony is that true maturity begins to occur when you are willing to confess your sins to others. We're often afraid to be so vulnerable, and yet people always seem to respond with warmth and understanding.
As James 5:16 says, healing occurs when you come to the point in your walk with God that you know you won't get rid of sin by concealing it; you need to become accountable within the Body of Christ. When we confess our sins to God and to others, then little by little we become like Jesus Christ.
Perhaps there is no better relationship than marriage for two people to begin to experience authenticity. There's no air brushing faults and removing blemishes here; it's life, up close and personal. Just like God intended it.
Prayer:
That God will conform you to His image as you make yourself more accountable to others in the Body of Christ.
Discuss: Are you concealing any sins that you need to confess, first to God and then to others?
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Time Out for Your Mate
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Posted:Nov 13, 2009 9:33 am
Last Updated:Dec 9, 2025 12:22 am 3751 Views
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Time Out for Your Mate Song of Solomon 3:2
I must arise now and go about the city; in the streets and in the squares I must seek him whom my soul loves.
An important step to building a strong marriage is to consistently set aside time with your mate. Unfortunately, we allow ourselves to become so busy that we don't make it a priority to spend uninterrupted time with our mates.Want some advice? Get alone. Find some time to get away together on a weekly basis.
Barbara and I have kept a Sunday night date for years. If someone invites us to do something else that night, we politely tell them no. We need this time to look at our schedules for the coming week or month, to talk about values, hassles, and how we can succeed in our marriage and family. It's also a time to enjoy each other's company.
Also, set aside daily time to get alone and talk. I'll never forget a couple of friends telling us, "Just wait until you have teenagers. You'll see." Boy have we seen! They come trooping into your bedroom at 11:00 or 11:30 at night and they want to talk! And they don't think anything about it.
You've got to shut the door and train your to leave it shut. Otherwise you will never have any private conversation for a husband and wife, let alone romance. This is download time-to talk, discuss and reconnect.
A third thing Barbara and I do a couple of times a year is get away for two nights-away from the , away from TV, away from the hustle and bustle of life. This is a time to refresh and review our values.
One of the most important gifts you can give your is the gift of being committed to your spouse. And believe me, it is awfully hard to be committed to one another when you don't make the time to have a relationship.
Prayer:
That you would begin making your relationship a higher priority.
Discuss: Figure out, as accurately as possible, how much time you have spent with each other-just the two of you-during the last week. What changes could you make in your schedule to make more time for each other? Pull out your calendars and pencil in your first date night and a two-day overnight getaway. And call 1-800-FL TODAY for information on one of our FamilyLife Marriage Conferences.
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Wanted A Mass Movement of Women Mentors
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Posted:Nov 12, 2009 1:10 pm
Last Updated:Dec 9, 2025 12:22 am 3574 Views
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Wanted: A Mass Movement of Women "Mentors" Titus 2:3,4
Older women likewise are to be reverent in their behavior...that they may encourage the young women to love their husbands, to love their .
I remember when, early in our marriage, Barbara went through periods of doubt as to how she was doing as a new wife. I would encourage her, saying, "You're doing fine, you're doing great." But I felt powerless to really affirm her.After we moved to Dallas, Barbara began attending a Bible study for young wives led by an older woman. This seasoned mother was on a mission-she loved coaching and encouraging these young moms. Under this woman's mentoring, Barbara's confidence soared as she saw that her struggles were not unique.
There's no doubt that the early years of marriage are really important. Roles are hammered out. Adjustments made. Expectations clarified. It's no wonder the divorce rate is the highest during the first five years of marriage.
I believe we could dramatically reduce divorce if more wives and mothers experienced what Barbara did-a mentor. A mentor is a women who has been there, who has lived it, who has loved her husband faithfully (not perfectly) and has biblical values to pass on.
As Barbara says, "A husband's encouragement means a lot, but sometimes it doesn't mean as much as another woman who has been there, who has done it, who comes alongside."
A number of years ago I watched with fascination as a dozen young wives and mothers answered the question: What would you like to see your church provide for you as a wife and mother? They were very clear in their responses-they didn't want a video, a tape, a conference, another book or a radio program. They wanted a real live mom to talk to and cry with-someone they could relate to and ask questions.
So I started challenging older wives and moms to become mentors. Their response? "We don't have all the answers. We've made too many mistakes." You know what? That's exactly the qualification you need to be a mentor.
Prayer:
Ask God to give you the faith to live your life as a "living and holy sacrifice" to Him.
Discuss: In what areas do you need encouragement in your role as a wife and mother?
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Solving Our Nations's Problems
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Posted:Nov 11, 2009 9:52 am
Last Updated:Dec 9, 2025 12:22 am 3562 Views
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Solving Our Nation's Problems Romans 12:1
I urge you therefore, brethren, by the mercies of God, to present your bodies a living and holy sacrifice, acceptable to God, which is your spiritual service of worship.
Nearly every week, you can pick up a newspaper or magazine, or watch a television show, focusing on the distressing social problems we face in our nation. CBS devotes an entire evening of prime-time television to a look at violence in America...Newsweek magazine runs a cover story on battered wives...Time reports that nearly half of Americans are worried "a lot" about our economy, and 89 percent think the crime problem is getting worse.But let me ask you this: How often do you hear about workable solutions to these problems?
I think the apostle Paul hints at the most practical solution of all in Romans 12:1 when he urges us to "present your bodies a living and holy sacrifice, acceptable to God."
Large social problems will end when they are solved, not in the halls of government, but in the hallways of homes across America. In short, change will occur when Christians get serious about their relationship with God and live out their values and priorities in the family.
Change will come when dads get down on their knees and ask their wives and to forgive them when they make an error. It will come when men take responsibility for their families and don't expect the Church to do it for them. It will come when men say, "I will lead my home."
Change will come when more women decide to make motherhood a greater priority than careers. It will come when more are raised with godly character by parents who are involved in their lives.
We have been called to proclaim Christ, to obey Him as we make an imprint on our society. To give ourselves as a "living and holy sacrifice" to God means we will allow nothing to come between us and Him-that we will live in obedience to His will no matter what the cost.
And if enough families begin living holy lives, making right choices, loving one another-America will experience a family reformation.
Prayer:
How would it affect your family if you began to get serious about living for Christ?
Discuss: As you look back at the last year, would you say that you have lived your life in complete, sacrificial obedience to God? If not, why?
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A Conspiracy of Silence
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Posted:Nov 10, 2009 1:14 pm
Last Updated:Dec 9, 2025 12:22 am 3398 Views
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A Conspiracy of Silence (Part Two) Proverbs 7:6,7
For at the window of my house I looked out through my lattice, and I saw among the naive, I discerned among the youths, a young man lacking sense.
In a culture saturated with conflicting and damaging views about sexuality, we need to aggressively seize the opportunity to shape our 's views. May I suggest three barriers every parent must dismantle if are to receive training necessary to traverse a landscape that is infested with traps, temptations and tests?
Barrier One: Our own ambivalent feelings about sex. Many parents never received solid sex education as , so they don't know how to teach their own .
And many others have baggage to deal with-their past mistakes. Growing up in an era where sex was said to be "free love," they learned that it was neither free nor was it love. Many have told me they fear their asking, "Were you a virgin when you married?"
Barrier Two: A shallow relationship with your . Good relationships demand intimacy, risk and courage. Some parents instinctively sense that they have not built strong relationships with their . When the time comes to broach this subject, they are uncomfortable because they know that the foundation isn't there.
But I believe God wants us to have these discussions with our not merely to educate them about sex, but also to move our relationship to a deeper, more intimate level.
Barrier Three: Fear. I've heard parents make statements like, "Well, I could never talk to my about that." What I want to say to you as a parent is you don't have to be an expert to talk to your . Just walk in there empowered by God, representing His perspective of this sacred area of life. It's a great privilege. And it's your responsibility.
Parents are standing by while their are being robbed of their innocence. It is time for us to seize our back from a culture that has held them as hostages.
Prayer:
For one another that you will tackle the barriers that would keep you from training your , and practice your Christianity where it really counts-at home with your teens.
Discuss: Which of the barriers to teaching your about sex apply to you? How would you describe your current plan for sex education? Do you feel it's adequate? Why, or why not?
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A Consiracy of Silence
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Posted:Nov 9, 2009 8:27 am
Last Updated:Dec 9, 2025 12:22 am 3987 Views
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A Conspiracy of Silence (Part One) Proverbs 4:1
Hear, O sons, the instruction of a father, and give attention that you may gain understanding.
A number of years ago a friend told me how his dad talked to him about sex. Evidently his mom wanted his father to have a "birds and bees" talk with him. So his dad came home from work one evening and said, "Tomorrow, , after school I want you to put on your Sunday clothes. We're going to town."The next afternoon they drove two hours to the "big" city of West Helena, Arkansas. The father took his into a bar and ordered dinner. Above them on a stage, a woman came out and proceeded to strip. The young man and his father sat there throughout the entire meal, not saying a word.
They drove home for two hours in darkness. When they arrived, the father walked in the front door, turned to the mother and declared, "There, I've done it. Now, I'm going to bed."
That was this young man's sex education.
How did you find out about sex? Was it through parents or peers? A book? School? A brother or sister giving you the scoop?
If there ever has been an era when parents need to have a game plan for educating in human sexuality, it is today. In a recent survey, 16- and 17-year-olds were asked, "Where have you learned about sex?" 22 percent: Parents 37 percent: Friends 15 percent: School 18 percent: Entertainment
I hope you caught that: Only 22 percent learned from their parents. The problem today with parents in the Christian community is there has been a conspiracy of silence on this subject.
We, of all people as Christians, ought to have a good, firm grip on the truth because our God created human sexuality in the first place. As my mentor and friend from Dallas Theological Seminary, Dr. Howard Hendricks, reminds us, "We should not be ashamed to discuss that which God was not ashamed to create."
Prayer:
For God's favor as you talk to your about human sexuality.
Discuss: How did you learn about sex? What was good and bad about your sex education?
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Parents Under the Influence of
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Posted:Nov 6, 2009 9:12 am
Last Updated:Dec 9, 2025 12:22 am 3479 Views
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Parents Under the Influence of Proverbs 14:26
In the fear of the Lord there is strong confidence, and His will have refuge.
Perhaps you can identify with a bumper sticker on a school bus that read: "Approach with caution. Driver under the influence of ." That's the way parents feel at times. We feel the effects of being under the influence of our .I recently traveled to Seattle to observe two focus groups composed of young Christian parents raising under 10 years of age. The five feelings these parents expressed reveal tremendous insight into the impact that raising has on parents:
Fear. Fathers and mothers talked of their fears of adolescence, of not being able to communicate with their going through these turbulent years. They were fearful their would turn out to be just like them in ways they didn't like. They feared failing as parents.
Guilt. They felt guilty over their mistakes and failures. They wondered if they were ruining their . They regretted things they had said and had done to their .
Frustration. They were frustrated and even angry when their didn't obey them. They felt they had to explain everything too many times to their .
Self-doubt. Were they doing it all wrong? Were their expectations too high or too low? Should they just let the underwear lie on the floor? How long should they let a throw a tantrum? And if they disciplined a , how could they know they did what was right?
Discouragement. They felt like they failed too often. They saw their own weaknesses-and their parents' weaknesses-emerging in their . They felt they lacked skills to raise their right.
These feelings, I believe, are like the worm that eats away at the apple, and they lead us to hopelessness and despair. It's no wonder that today's parents feel like they are "under the influence of ."
Yet God promises you in His Word that He is your confidence. He is the Master Encourager. As you seek Him, He will be faithful to cause His will to come to pass...in your life and in your .
Prayer:
With your mate that God will give you the confidence, wisdom and strength to be an effective parent who doesn't give up.
Discuss: Which of the emotions listed above can you identify with?
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