|
|
Does God Want Honesty or Butt Kissing?
|
Posted:Jul 11, 2007 10:19 am
Last Updated:Jul 13, 2007 10:49 pm 768 Views
|
I had an honest talk with God, telling Him what was in my heart---what I suspect is in many peoples' hearts, telling Him I don't see that He is taking care of me, of you, of that Christian in Pakistan, etc. in a personal way. I don't see that He cares for each person on an individual level. I used to. I've fought to continue to believe it. But I don't.
I was in a bc chatroom yesterday.Someone asked how I was doing. I mentioned my prayer. After awhile, I said enough about me, how's everyone else doing? But a person wouldn't let it go; they wanted to talk about it.
Then the person accused me of self pity. This isn't self pity. If it were, I wouldn't continue to praise God, I'd blow my brains out.
I wouldn't continue to seek ways to serve Him, I'd sit and sulk.
I wouldn't talk to Gd about it, I'd go out to a bar.
This is a very strong sense of what's right and wrong, and to allow your to suffer constantly, then say,"Oh, it's so your faith will be stronger",or "It's so you can be a good example", sounds to me like a cop-out.
But the person in the chatroom wouldn't listen.
I suspect because it's easiest to put things--and people--in neat little boxes.
I see that many things must be endured for faith to grow.
I also see that a loving parent makes sure their 's life isn't Hell.
The person in the chat room began praying, in capital letters, over and over, that Jesus would cast out the negativity and self pity from I Corinthians 13. They wouldn't quit.
Christians having to put everyone in a neat little box, and not listening---these are two of the main reasons non-Christians are so irritated by Christians.
I finally just left the chatroom, like so many people finally leave the church. I'm a stubborn soul though, and I love God even when I'm mad at Him, so I'm not leaving the church. But I wish---how I wish---more Christians understood that people don't fit into neat little boxes, and having an honest talk with God isn't a crime. If it is, then Elijah, David, Moses, and even Jesus are guilty as charged.
|
|
|
0
Comments
|
|
God, the secret is out!
|
Posted:Jul 10, 2007 12:48 pm
Last Updated:Jul 13, 2007 10:49 pm 951 Views
|
I've been restless lately. Nothing is satisfying. Gardening--what's up with that stupid grape vine? doesn't it know where the arbor is? Conga playing---come on! There have to be more ways to play!
Tried out for the Sweet Adelines--a women's a capella chorus that performs across the country. They want me. I was bored. I should be ecstatic.
WHAT'S WRONG WITH ME?
So I began praying, and know what came out?
Anger. At God. I didn't know it was there.
"You don't care, God! Every day is a struggle. A struggle with the bills. A struggle to get along with my . A struggle sometimes just to walk in the morning. I'M TIRED OF STRUGGLING! And if you cared, God, once in awhile you would make sure that your had it easy in life. And don't give me that crap about making my faith like gold. My faith has been burnished so much, they can see the reflection of the sun at the space station. Yeah, you cared when you sent your , but that was two-freakin' thousand years ago! WHERE ARE YOU? And why are your people the ones who suffer so much, while evil people are having a great time? If you were the loving parent you claim to be, once in awhile---just once in awhile---your would have it easy! But no, we keep going through hard times.
You know what, God? You don't care about me. Yeah, you care about mankind. And I appreciate that you sent your . I will continue to praise you. After all, you ARE God and you did send your for us. But you don't care about me as a person. No, don't give me that garbage about knowing the number of hairs on my head. With the stress I've been through, I've lost some hair; shoot, I can count how many hairs I have right now. But you did your good thing for mankind, every once in awhile you comfort us, and that's it. As far as caring about ME as an individual--you could care less. I give up a lot to make sure my have a life they can enjoy. That's what a parent does. But all across the world, and across time, your have suffered, and you just say in the Bible that it's so they can become better people. Garbage! You just don't care! If you were a real parent, you would try to make their lives more enjoyable. Yes, I understand about needing to grow, blah, blah, blah. Those are just excuses for not giving your anything, not paying attention to them on a personal level.The bottom line is: I will continue to praise you because you are God, but you don't give a RIP about me.
|
|
|
0
Comments
|
|
|
|
I Want to Go To Church!
|
Posted:Jul 8, 2007 3:56 pm
Last Updated:May 12, 2024 1:6 pm 765 Views
|
My church has shut down almost everything for the summer. Weird. But I'm a newbie here so I can't do much about changing things...yet.
In the meantime, I'm looking for some place to go to church on Sunday night. Who knows? Maybe even mid-week?
I love shopping!
BUT-----
I HATE CHURCH SHOPPING!
For one thing, you never know what you're walking into. I research what they believe. I call, talk to someone, usually the preacher. But you just never know what's going to happen 'til you get there.
One church I visited had a thing for showing films on Sunday night. These films were supposed to teach people to be better Christians, but the last one I saw was on street racing. Yep, you heard right. It was a bunch of people with tricked-out cars, laughing and racing up and down the street. Ever since then, I've had this strange urge to buy a '70 Plymouth Roadrunner, put wide white walls on it, jack it up, put a loud muffler on it, and TAKE IT OUT!!! I'm not sure, but I don't THINK that was what the film was supposed to accomplish....
Another church I visited, the songs were great! The people didn't seem to want to sing very much, but I love to sing, so I didn't let that bother me. And the musicians seemed to have a lot of fun at their worship. Then came the sermon. I fell asleep FIVE TIMES. I'm not a sleeper in church. But that preacher had a way of talking that could smooth a cactus.And boy could he preach a long time! Got free bread there, though. It was moldy, but it was free.
Then there are the places that say,"We go only by the Bible!" And forget to mention the little booklet that they hand out when you walk in the door. You know, the one that tells what you REALLY can and can't do.
I'm tired of getting lost in the crowd, or sticking out like a bald guy at a Hair Club Convention.
Tonight I'm trying another church. A friend I knew in grade school went to this church.
All I know is I WANT TO GO TO CHURCH!
So...I'll keep looking...
|
|
|
0
Comments
|
|
|
|
What Did I Step in NOW?
|
Posted:Jul 7, 2007 11:57 am
Last Updated:Jul 7, 2007 3:05 pm 694 Views
|
I was on bc yesterday. A friend was feeling down. I said,"Let me know if there's anything I can do to help".
First things first----The person was a man.
The person is a friend.
The friend said he knew how to handle it, but thank you. Some others in the chatroom also offered their help. Some commiserated; they wanted him to know they had been there and they understood.
Then the oddest things happened...
one of the people who had been talking to the friend said we were coddling him, she was obviously on the wrong site, and now she going was leaving. She was angry.
Then a man in the chatroom said I was "sidling up" to my friend. I don't know where THAT man lives, but where I live, when you "sidle up" to somebody, you sell them drugs--or something else. At the very least, it carries a negative connotation.
Where I live, when someone needs support, you offer it. What is so strange about that?
I still can't figure out what I---and the others in the chatroom who caught some of the criticism--did wrong.
When I chose Big Church as a chat site, I was hoping to avoid the obscenities and propositions that occur on the other sites.
Boy, was I naive! At least on the other sites, you don't see people with religious I.D.'s deliberately misspelling the "f" word just so they can curse. At least the people on the non-religious chat sites aren't hypocrites about it. This site gets just as raunchy as any other. Anyone who has been on this site for any length of time can attest to that. Body parts, sex, what's done in the bathroom, etc., it's all here on Big Church. It gets pretty old.
And now, in addition to the raunchiness, there's the angry judgmental attitude that's prevalent in so many religious people.
Still, there are a lot of good people. They are wonderful to talk to.
But some days I simply don't have the energy to go wading through the muck in order to get to the diamonds...
|
|
|
0
Comments
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
