Jerusalem 9.02.08
|
Posted:Sep 7, 2008 2:10 am
Last Updated:Jan 4, 2009 7:21 am 4534 Views
|
JERUSALEM-ON-THE-LINE September 2, 2008
"For God has bound all men over to disobedience so that He may have mercy on them all." Rom 11:32
OLMERT: LET FOREIGNERS HELP CHANGE STATUS OF JERUSALEM:
PM Ehud Olmert has proposed to PA Chairman Mahmoud Abbas that the international community help determine the status of Jerusalem. Yasser Arafat, Abbas' predecessor, rejected a similar offer in 2000. His disdain for the proposal sparked the Oslo War that unleashed suicide bombings, machine-gun ambushes and rocket attacks that have killed more than 1,000 Israelis. PM Olmert in recent months claimed Jerusalem is Israel's "undivided and eternal" capital, and the coalition Shas party has said several times it will topple the government if the status of Jerusalem is negotiated. However, Olmert continues to successfully maneuver negotiations around the Shas obstacle. (INN) "You live in the midst of deception; in their deceit they refuse to acknowledge Me, declares the Lord." Jer 9:6
SHAS CHIEF: OLMERT HAS NO AUTHORITY TO DECIDE FATE OF JERUSALEM:
Shas Chairman Eli Yishai said Sunday August 31st, Olmert has no legal or public authority to make a deal with the Palestinians and certainly not to decide the fate of Jerusalem. "Any agreement with them will be the basis for more terror. It is clear to everyone that Jerusalem's fate cannot be negotiated like it was a currency, and certainly not with international participation," said Yishai. (Haaretz) "I will refine and test them, for what else can I do because of the sin of My people?" Jer 9
ISRAEL HAS DECIDED: IRAN WILL NOT HAVE NUKES: Israel's leadership weeks ago resolved in top-level strategic discussions to do whatever it takes to prevent Iran from having nuclear bombs. The US is refusing to cooperate with the Israeli plan and will not give the Jewish state necessary permission and codes it needs to fly over Iraq in order to attack Iran. One security source put it this way: "The Americans have accepted the fact that Iran will be a nuclear power, and are trying to get us to accept it too...but we won't." (INN)
HEZBOLLAH: WE HAVE NEW MISSILES ISRAEL CAN'T FATHOM:
The Lebanon-based group Hezbollah is armed with advanced Iranian-supplied missiles capable of reaching targets deep inside Israel. The press report quotes senior Arab sources who claim the terrorist group plans to use the missiles in the event Israel decides to attack Iranian nuclear facilities, or if the US launches an offensive that has the potential to ignite a regional war. Iranian defense experts are also reportedly in Lebanon in an effort to assist Hezbollah in developing anti-aircraft capabilities. (Haaretz) "As they wail and mourn over you, they will take up a lament concerning you: 'Who was ever silenced like Tyre, surrounded by the sea?'" Ezek. 27:32
WEST FEARS HEZBOLLAH SETTING UP CELLS IN VENEZUELA: The budding strategic partnership between Venezuela and Iran has prompted fears from Western governments that Hezbollah is establishing a growing number of operational cells in the South American country. The Lebanon-based Shi'ite organization is believed to be one of a number of anti-Western terrorist groups that have moved "people and things" into South America, according to one US anti-terrorism spokesman. Officials in the Bush administration and Jerusalem have expressed concern Hezbollah is taking advantage of the close relationship between its Iranian patrons and Venezuela's anti-American president, Hugo Chavez. (Haaretz)
CONSERVATIVES CHEER SARAH PALIN AS VP PICK: Presidential Republican candidate John McCain chose Alaska Governor Sarah Palin to be his vice presidential running mate August 29th. Palin apparently has never spoken publicly about Israel and has little foreign policy experience. She does, however, have a strong working relationship with Alaska's Jewish community. Palin has been strongly applauded by leading US Christians for her common sense, sound principles and conservative pro-life stand. She has been described as a strong executive who hates corruption and puts principle above politics. The Republican Jewish Coalition issued a very favorable response to McCain's running mate selection. (CNS)
GILAD SHALIT TURNS 22 IN HAMAS CAPTIVITY: Kidnapped IDF Staff Sgt. Gilad Shalit turned 22 last Thursday, and as the vast majority of his fellow soldiers return to their civilian lives, some going on to university and others taking up careers, the young soldier continues to languish in terrorist hands. This is the third year Shalit has spent his birthday in captivity with the Hamas terrorists in Gaza since being abducted on June 25, 2006. While Israel continues to negotiate for his release, little progress has been made despite past optimistic statements by PM Ehud Olmert to the contrary. (Haaretz) Pray for a miraculous deliverance for Gilad.
HAMAS UPS ANTE IN SHALIT DEAL: Hamas recently increased the number of Palestinian prisoners it wants Israel to release in exchange for kidnapped soldier Gilad Shalit, from 1,000 to 1,500. Last month's deal with Hezbollah, in which Israel freed terrorist murderer Samir Kuntar and four other prisoners in exchange for the bodies of two kidnapped soldiers, has hardened Hamas' stance, defense officials said. (Haaretz)
"The Lord hears the needy and does not despise His captive people." Ps 69:33
WHERE ARE ISRAEL'S ELEMENTARY SCHOOL DROP-OUTS?: Some 3,500 Israeli in grades 1 through 6 dropped out of school last year, and the Education Ministry has no information about them. "There are big 'holes' in the school system, and we lack complete information on thousands of pupils, even in the lowest grades," a senior ministry official said. Some 58% of elementary-school dropouts are boys. (Haaretz) "Fathers, do not exasperate your ; instead, bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord." Eph 6:4 Vision for Israel & The Joseph Storehouse has so far distributed 10,000 new school packs and supplies to needy school in 2008. Make a today at http://bigchurch.com
ISRAEL'S INVENTION HELPS PARALYZED PEOPLE WALK: Paralyzed for the past 20 years, former Israeli paratrooper, Radi Kaiof, now walks down the street with a dim mechanical hum. That is the sound of an electronic exoskeleton moving the 41-year-old's legs and propelling him forward. The device called ReWalk, invented by an Israeli engineer, helps people paralyzed below the waist to stand, walk and climb stairs. (Reuters)
Blessings from Jerusalem,
Barry Segal with the Editorial Staff
|
|
|
0
Comments
|
|
Prayers Answered ... Exceeding JOY ! ! !
|
Posted:Aug 31, 2008 1:10 pm
Last Updated:Nov 20, 2008 9:00 am 4296 Views
|
Prayers Answered ... Exceeding JOY ! ! !
With the Lord's help, I have been fasting and praying for this country and upcoming election.
My prayer has been freverent and asking more in line with the Father's heart and will. I asked that He place a seed / seeds of RIGHTEOUSNESS in the White House.
When I heard the news Friday morning of Sarah Palin as John McCain's running mate, the JOY of the LORD flooded me.
The recent birth of her , born with downs syndrome, has initials that fortell the future:
Trig Paxson Van Palin
TPVP ....The Presidentials Vice President
How is that for prophetic venue?
( following excerpt from Wikipdeia )
Palin gave birth to her youngest , Trig, on April 18, 2008, while in office as governor. Her pregnancy is reported to have surprised Alaskans, including her staff; she didn't tell her staff
that she was pregnant until March 5--seven months into the pregnancy.[94] Her water broke one month before Trig was due, but she kept a previous speaking engagement in Texas and then flew 8 hours to Alaska.[95] She returned to the office
three days after delivering the .[96][23] The baby has Down's syndrome; Palin's decision to have the baby was applauded by the pro-life community.[97][98]
( this news release says it all joyously )
Palin electrifies conservative base
Jonathan Martin1 hour, 55 minutes ago
ST. PAUL - The selection of Sarah Palin as John McCain's running mate has electrified conservative activists, providing a boost of energy to the GOP nominee-in-waiting from a key
constituency that had been previously had been lukewarm - at best - about him.
By tapping the anti-abortion and pro-gun Alaska governor just ahead of his convention, which is set to start here Monday, McCain hasn't just won approval from a skeptical Republican base - he's ignited a wave of elation and emotion that has
led some grassroots activists to weep with joy.
Serious questions remain about McCain's pick - exactly how much he knows about her and her positions, past and present, on key issues. But for the worker bee core of the party that is
essential to any Republican victory there are no doubts.
"I woke up and my email was just going crazy," said Charmaine Yoest, head of the legislative arm of Americans United for Life and a former top official in Mike Huckabee's presidential campaign.
"And then when it was announced -- it was like you couldn't breathe."
The media elite - as well as elite members of the GOP consulting community - have all but mocked Palin as a former small town mayor with zero Washington experience. But that view of her totally misses the cultural resonance she carries to crucial Republican power centers and could not be more at odds with the jubilation felt among true believers that one of their own is on the ticket.
Palin, say conservative activists, has instantly changed how they feel about McCain's campaign and spurred them to go to work for the Republican ticket.
First, though, they're expressing their newfound fondness for McCain with their checkbooks. Since tapping Palin, the campaign has raised nearly $7 million online, according to McCain aides.
Most importantly for McCain, the two constituencies who are most energized by Palin just happen to be the two grassroots pillars of the GOP: anti-abortion activists and pro-Second
Amendment enthusiasts and sportsmen. Without these two camps making phone calls, stuffing envelopes and knocking on doors, Republican presidential candidates would severely lack for volunteers. They are critical to the health of the conservative coalition that has dominated Republican politics for a generation.
Republicans say the primary source for the passion can be found in Palin's example and authenticity.
Not only is the 44-year-old governor opposed to abortion rights -- but she carried and gave birth to a with Down syndrome earlier this year, a profound and powerful motivating force to both
opponents of abortion rights and the parents and relatives of special needs .
And not only is she a supporter of the right to bear arms - but she's a life member of the NRA and an avid hunter and fishermen whose gubernatorial office couch is adorned with
a massive Grizzly bear pelt.
"She's lived it!" exulted Yoest "It's so satisfying as a conservative woman. When she walked out on that stage there was just this
moment. It was really emotional for a lot of us."
After hearing the news Yoest, who was in St. Paul preparing for the convention, said she and other Republican women here "were grabbing each other and jumping up and down."
Steve Duprey, a former New Hampshire GOP chairman and top McCain backer who hails from the moderate wing of the party, was also in the Twin Cities when the news broke.
"I was in the Rules Committee with about 150 people in the room. They had TVs set up and we took a break to watch the announcement. For a second after she came out, it was silent. Then there was a gasp and everybody stood up and started cheering and clapping. We stayed
standing the whole speech."
After Palin finished, he said, the emotion set in.
"There were 10 or 12 women, party stalwarts, in tears, using napkins and handkerchiefs."
Part of the reason for the joy is what President Bush once called, in another context, "the soft bigotry of low expectations." Social conservatives just didn't expect one of their own to be tapped and were actually bracing themselves for the selection of a supporter of abortion rights.
"There is an electricity going through the social conservative crowd right now; it's unbelievable," said James Muffett, head of Michigan's Citizens for Traditional Values, who had met with
McCain in the weeks leading up to his selection of a running mate. "Especially given all the set-ups and head fakes - it's amazing. A lot of people were sure he was going to show his more moderate colors."
Muffett said the effect on his conservative comrades-in-arms has been immediate and visceral.
"My wife and I watched an MSNBC special on her last night," he said. "My wife knew nothing about this woman. But she was in tears listening to her articulate the views she had."
Since the pick, Muffett said, he's gotten dozens of emails and the phones have been ringing off the hook" from other social conservatives who had assumed McCain would spurn them.
"They were taunting me, saying 'McCain's going to disappoint you,' " he said of the sentiment before the pick.
Since?
"'Boy, what kind of prayers have you been saying for McCain?'" he said with a chuckle about the question asked on one phone call. "He went and chose a Pentecostal for his running mate!"
The adoration goes beyond Christian conservatives.
Sportsmen are also overjoyed at the addition of one of their own, and can't get enough of video and pictures showing Paliln firing a weapon.
"She's one of us," wrote Michael Bane, a prominent Colorado-based gun enthusiast who has a show on the Outdoor Channel, on his blog. "FINALLY, we can get 100% behind the Republican
ticket ... change we can believe in!"
"You know I've had my problems with McCain, but he has reached out a hand to us both at the NRA Annual Meeting [earlier this year] and with the amazing selection of Sarah Palin as his running
mate," Bane added.
And then there is the contrast: "While ( Barack Obama ) wants to ban AR-15s; Palin shoots AR-15s, and apparently pretty well."
"Every shooter, every hunter, every gun owner, every competitor needs to understand that it is time to, in the words of Bruce Willis, 'cowboy the 'f...' up.' "
Chris Cox, the top political aide at the NRA, suggested that his job just got a whole lot easier, not just with a pro-gun Republican
vice-presidential nominee but a Democratic number two - Delaware Sen. Joe Biden - who is anathema to the Second Amendment community
"We'll be able to have some fun contrasting not just McCain and Obama, but Biden and Palin," said Cox, whose organization is giving "I'm a Bitter Gun Owner and I Vote!" signs and t-shirts to
its members. "She's great on our issues and [Biden’s] been terrible for 35 years."
Her image as a pistol-packin'-mamma could prove especially key in the hunter-filled Rust Belt, said Paul Erhardt, a longtime political strategist who specializes on gun issues.
"Palin could play strong in the sporting states like Michigan, Ohio and Pennsylvania depending on how they use her," he said. "Most pundits will underestimate her appeal in these key areas because they don't know her and they are unfamiliar with the sporting scene. But among sportsmen, authenticity counts and Palin's got that and then some."
Palin also reassures those concerned about McCain's judgment on judges. Said Gary Marx, head of the Judicial Confirmation Network and a former Mitt Romney aide: "I can tell you that this
pick tells millions in the base of the party that they can trust McCain. More specifically that they can trust him with Supreme Court picks and other key appointments"
The sense of rejuvenation is not just limited to party activists, though. Conservative elites, among the most disdainful of McCain, are also coming around.
James Dobson, long a McCain skeptic, said after the announcement Friday that he'd support Palin.
And he's not alone.
"I've talked to two prominent social conservative leaders in the past 24 hours who told me they had previously not planned to attend the convention, but were now coming to Minneapolis after the Palin pick," wrote Ralph Reed, a Christian conservative leader who has tangled with McCain,
in an email. "One scrambled to find a hotel room and is coming tomorrow; the other re-arranged his schedule and is flying in Wednesday. I got a call this afternoon from an evangelical business leader who told me he was contacting the McCain campaign and offering to host a fundraiser with
his friends for McCain (sans the candidate) before the Thursday deadline [when McCain shifts to the public financing system]. I don’t know if I've ever seen a veep pick energize the grassroots like this."
Rush Limbaugh, who exulted on the air this week, summed up the response he's gotten from his loyal listeners: "Home f***ing run."
"Palin=Guns, Babies, Jesus," he wrote in an email. "Contrast that to Obama's bitter clingers. Obama just lost blue-collar, white Democratic voters in Pennsylvania and other states."
And, he said, the line that the pick was aimed at picking off Democratic women who backed Hillary Rodham Clinton doesn't get it right.
"The choice is to shore up the conservative, pro-drilling base," he said. "This is an aggressive, on-offense pick, not a defensive pick."
The pick caps off what has been a turbulent few weeks for conservative Republicans.
Muffett, who was talking on his cell phone from a church outing at Ohio's Cedar Park amusement park, likened McCain's campaign to the world-record 17 roller coasters that dot the park on the banks of Lake Erie.
"Oh my gosh, holy moly," he said. "He floated the
pro-abortion running mate, then there was his
performance at the Saddleback debate, and then
you had the Lieberman headfake and now this."
"Up and down, up and down.
For now, though, at least as it relates to the
long-mistrustful conservatives he'll need
energized to win, McCain is sky-high.
"Now that he has so thoroughly exceeded their expectations for his candidacy (first with his stellar performance at the Saddleback Showdown,
now with his selection of his running mate), social conservatives are finally putting on their cleats and getting on to the field," said Reed. "It's really quite remarkable, and something that no one would have guessed would happen even three months ago."
|
|
|
0
Comments
|
|
What About Lightning ? ! ?
|
Posted:Aug 26, 2008 4:54 am
Last Updated:Jun 27, 2010 7:28 am 4845 Views
|
What About Lightning ? ! ?
Barak ...per Hebrew names meaning....
"lightning" or "glitter, splendor, glare, flash, gleam, shine" *
( Does this not describe perfectly the persona of Barak Obama? )
If you think about lightning....it comes as a flash or glitter....
it makes a boastful show and then it is gone in a flash... no
more to be found or seen.....! ! ! HalleluYaH ! ! !
Luke 10v18 And he said unto them,
"I beheld Satan as lightning fall from heaven."
Isaiah 14v12 How art thou fallen from heaven, O Lucifer,
of the morning! how art thou cut down to the ground,
which didst weaken the nations!
Isaiah 14v13 For thou hast said in thine heart, I will ascend into heaven,
I will exalt my throne above the stars of God: I will sit also upon the
mount of the congregation, in the sides of the north:
Isaiah 14v14 I will ascend above the heights of the clouds;
I will be like the most High.
Ezekiel 28v7 Behold, therefore I will bring strangers upon thee,
the terrible of the nations: and they shall draw their swords
against the beauty of thy wisdom, and they shall defile thy *brightness.
Ezekiel 28v8 They shall bring thee down to the pit, and thou shalt die
the deaths of them that are slain in the midst of the seas.
Ezekiel 28v9 Wilt thou yet say before him that slayeth thee,
I am God? but thou shalt be a man, and no God, in the hand
of him that slayeth thee.
Ezekiel 28v10 Thou shalt die the deaths of the uncircumcised
by the hand of strangers: for I have spoken it, saith the Lord GOD.
Ezekiel 28v11 Moreover the word of the LORD came unto me, saying,
Ezekiel 28v12 of man, take up a lamentation upon the king of **Tyrus,
and say unto him, Thus saith the Lord GOD; Thou sealest up the sum,
full of wisdom, and perfect in beauty.
Ezekiel 28v13 Thou hast been in Eden the garden of God; every
precious stone was thy covering, the sardius, topaz, and the diamond,
the beryl, the onyx, and the jasper, the sapphire, the emerald, and the
carbuncle, and gold: the workmanship of thy tabrets and of thy pipes
was prepared in thee in the day that thou wast created. ( what a sparkler )
Ezekiel 28v14 Thou art the anointed cherub that covereth; and I have
set thee so: thou wast upon the holy mountain of God; thou hast walked
up and down in the midst of the stones of fire. ( Hawaii )
Ezekiel 28v15 Thou wast perfect in thy ways from the day that thou
wast created, till iniquity was found in thee.
**Tyrus...means a rock...Ba_rock .
|
|
|
0
Comments
|
|
Men & Women's Differences...Hiliarious
|
Posted:Aug 20, 2008 9:15 pm
Last Updated:Nov 20, 2008 8:43 am 3960 Views
|
Note: this is a two-part in one.
Note: I got this transcript from James Robison show, "LIFE TODAY".
I had to get this one inside of me. It is great info and highly true. Read on!
Week 32
8/4/08
James: Welcome to LIFE Today. I'm James Robison. Betty and I appreciate the opportunity of sharing with you.
Betty, we have so many guests who talk about marriage. With all the guests we have that deal with marriage you've got to wonder if we're just working on our marriage. We've got a guest that has a marriage seminar, "Laugh Your Way to a Better Marriage; Unlocking the Secrets to Life, Love, and Marriage." Here is the book, and then he has a four DVD teaching series where he takes this whole seminar and makes it available. He pastors a great church in Green Bay, Wisconsin. But he does these seminars all over the country.
I'm really curious to know how he thinks we're going to laugh our way to a better marriage. A lot of people have said, from then on I've been crying -- I'd like to laugh.
I want you to welcome the author and the teacher of these seminars, Mark Gungor, to LIFE Today.
Mark, good to see you!
Mark: Thank you!
James: I've been through the book enough to know that you really cut to the chase. You really do tell it like it is. Doesn't it take some church people who are a little stuffy and a little concerned about being as outspoken and plain truth, let's say provocative speaker/writer as you are? Do you ever seem to catch them off guard?
Mark: Once in a while, but not very often. I think if I'd tried to do this ten years ago it would never have gone over. But culture has changed a lot and I think people have realized that we are in such trouble in the church today with marriages and stuff, I think everybody is open to anything -- even guys like me!
[Laughing]
There has been an opening for me!
James: Is this what you do? You just laugh at everybody until they get to feeling better?
Mark: Pretty much! [Laughing]
James: Do you really think marriage is this funny?
Mark: No! No! No! Not at all! I'm sorry! No!
Actually, it is not about laughing in your marriage, a lot of people think that because of the title.
"Laugh Your Way to a Better Marriage" is really about the process of learning, it is how I teach people. I do it for two reasons. One reason is if you do something emotionally when you're learning something, it burns into your memory and you can remember it forever, laughter is one of those things.
I have a totally different kind of conference. There are no workbooks, no note taking, no emotional break outs, nothing like the typical marriage seminar. But yet the vast majority of people can tell you all the main points because they laughed when they learned it. That is the number one reason we do it.
James: What do you find the main points of emphasis to be when you take off with this seminar? How do you approach it?
Mark: The first thing I do is try to relate to men, which is the other reason that I use the laughter thing -- that is reason number two. I try to get men involved in the process.
Men don't want to go to most marriage seminars; there are lots of reasons for that. One reason is that most seminars have been so slanted from a female perspective that these seminars beat up on men, quite frankly, for not being women. “You need to be more emotional. You need to be in touch with your feelings. You've got to go shopping!” All this kind of stuff. This is ridiculous!
James: You mean you don't do all that kind of stuff?
Mark: No, I don't. No, I don't!
James: Betty and I do, that's all I do!
[Laughter]
Mark: Really, if you ask most women to describe their ideal man, listen to them, they'll describe another woman.
[Laughter]
They do!
And the reality is men make really terrible girlfriends. We make great husbands; we make great men.
So my thing is to validate the male experience. There are no workbooks in my seminar, there are no emotional break-out sessions; you don't have to speak in front of a group, all of those things that are hell to most men. I call my seminar extremely friendly to men because they don't have to do anything. They just laugh, listen, and learn and it draws them in.
James: And do women like these seminars?
Mark: Women love it! They do! You wouldn't think so, but they do.
[Laughing]
James: Why do they like it?
Mark: Because they finally understand men.
Most seminars are trying to get men to understand women. It is an exercise in futility. Who would think of that? They'll never get it.
But men are pretty simple. We're not terribly deep. Do you know what I'm talking about? So I get women to understand men because, let's face it, women have the power. Anyone who has been around us for a long time knows that the girls have the power.
But if they understand the keys to succeeding with a man, a woman can get pretty much whatever she needs out of the guy if she will understand him. So I spend more time trying to explain men to women than vice versa.
James: So the women can get what they want.
Mark: Yeah, pretty much!
James: So then the women really like the seminar. Now you've got everybody.
Mark: Yeah, absolutely!
Betty: They also learn that their guy is not the only one that acts the way he acts and that all men act that way?
[Laughing]
Mark: Yes! It's very liberating for women because they're convinced their husband is demon possessed. And why did I get this one? You know what I'm saying?
But when I start describing all men are kind of this way, women start going, "Thank heavens! I thought it was me!"
I start showing them how they can succeed with men. It is pretty easy actually.
James: Tell us some of the ways that men are similar that we should not feel bad about and women should understand. Because help us all!
Let me just say this now, there are not many marriages laughing and they're not happy. They don't talk, they don't communicate, they just exist. To me it is very, very sad; it breaks my heart.
Mark: It’s because they get so frustrated and angry with each other.
The reason I spend so much time trying to get women to understand is that they are the ones who are the angriest and the most bitter; 80% of all divorces in America, including the church, are filed by women. It is the women who have had it up to here. They can't take it anymore because all of their expectations, all that they're hoping for is not realized and they just can't take it anymore.
I come in and I'm turning the lights on for them and say, look, this is what men are really like. This is what you can really expect. And this is how you can start succeeding with this guy. And they love it and they embrace it.
The men finally feel validated now instead of always being beat up for being men. We're not celebrated for being men. I don't think men are broken, twisted, broken perverts, I just think we're men.
[Laughing]
I think we've been this way for thousands of years. Do you think we were any different 2,000 years ago? I don't think so!
James: It is the "dirty old man syndrome." That's what people think.
Betty: You're not saying it's hopeless for men to change and do better -- are you?
[Laughter]
Give us some hope here!
[Laughing]
Mark: Now here's the funny thing, women do have a positive impact on men and women can help improve men. What they don't understand is that it is a very long process. The good news is you can eventually get us to where you want us. The bad news is then we die because it took so long.
James: Are you trying to speed the trip up a little bit? Not to death -- but speed up the process so you make the women happy.
What are some of the things that you think women should understand are typical and normal and acceptable about us?
Mark: Number one: how to get a guy to do what you want him to do. Big money here! Okay, girls?
Betty: And you said we can't take notes?
Mark: Oh, you can! Girls can take notes -- it is the men who don't want to take the notes because we don't want to think about stuff.
Number one: ask for what you want. Now that stands awfully simplistic but you'd be surprised at how many women are listening right now that are thinking, "Well, if he really loved me, I wouldn't have to ask!" Which is absurd! Men are not mind readers. We do not have E.S.P. We have E.S.P.N. which is a whole different thing! Okay, so number one, ask for what you want.
Number two: you need to ask more than once. Asking a man to do something once is like never having asked him to do it at all!
[Laughing]
And this makes women crazy.
When I was first studying this, I didn't believe it. I really didn't. I thought, well, this can't be true. I'm married to a woman who has no problem asking me more than once. So when I first studied this, I thought, this can't be true. I went out and interviewed some women. I came to the first lady and said, "Let me ask you a question. Do you have a hard time getting your husband to do stuff for you?"
She said, "Pastor, you have no idea! I asked that man to paint the ceiling back in October and it is March and he hadn't done it!" She was just getting mad telling me about it. Okay?
Well then I asked her this question, "How many times did you ask him to do it?"
She stared at me like a at a new dish. You know? She said, "Once!"
I said, "Once? Why wouldn't you ask more than once?"
"I shouldn't have to!" She just got as mad as she could.
So I went and found another woman. I asked her, "Do you have a hard time getting your husband to do stuff for you?"
She said, "Pastor, you have no idea! I will take the laundry and stick it in the middle of the living room and I'll say, 'Honey, put away your laundry." And he doesn't do it. It will sit there for a month! He will walk around it. He'll step over it."
I'll never forget, she folded her arms and said, "Pastor, can't men see laundry?" I said, "Yeah, we can see it, we just don't care!"
But I didn't care about that. I asked, "How many times did you ask him to do it?"
She gave me that same startled look. "Once!"
I couldn't believe it. I said, "Why wouldn't you ask him more than once?"
"I shouldn't have to!"
All the women I asked had the same response. So my response to ladies is, “Guess what? You have to! Just asking once isn't getting anywhere.”
And then thirdly, don't insult when you ask. A lot of women, even Christian women feel led of the Lord to use insult as a way to motivate a man. "What's the matter with you? Can't you pick up the laundry?"
[Laughter]
"Nope! I can't! I'm sorry."
"Hey, hey, hey! Is that your underwear?"
"Better be!"
So they insult.
All right, now hold on a second because I've already got a bunch of women mad at me in the crowd already. Forget about your husband for a second.
Let me ask you about your relationship with God. If you want something from God, what do you have to do?
Number one, you have to ask for what you want. Even though Jesus taught us that God, unlike your husbands, knows what you want before you ask him, but if you don't ask him, you're not getting Jack squat out of God. Okay?
Number two, Jesus said you need to ask more than once. That proves God is a man right there.
[Laughter]
Argument over, man, I'm telling you!
Jesus taught us to ask. Keep on asking. Knock, keep on knocking.
Okay, number three. You don't insult God when he doesn't move as quick as you think he should.
Hey!
[Laughter]
Now think about this for a minute. Millions of Christian women try to hold their husbands to a higher standard than God almighty! And you wonder why you're all so mad all of the time. Just chill out a little bit!
[Laughter]
They'll do that with God but not with that man, “I shouldn't have to.” [Rrh-rrh-rrh-rrh!] Oh, my goodness gracious.
Number four, train him with positive reinforcement.
Now how do you train a man?
Training a man is like training a chimpanzee. All right?
[Laughter]
Chimp fans back here.
[Laughter]
Now what does that mean?
If you're a trainer and the chimp does what you want you give him a reward. If he doesn't do what you want, you just don't give him a reward. You don't beat up the monkey, you'll freak him out. You know what I'm saying?
[Laughter]
Because when you come around you'll have a freaked out ape running from you.
So the question is how does a woman reward a man?
By appreciating the pathetic things that he does. Okay? Because men love to be appreciated. Don't they? We live for respect. We're all about it.
My wife trains me this way saying, "Thank you, dear. I appreciate you." That kind of thing.
I was at home by myself and I've actually gotten trained to the point I can put away a dirty dish in a dishwasher. Right? I went over to the dishwasher and opened it up but it was full of clean dishes and that's a moral dilemma to a man. I'm like --
[Laughter]
Finally, it dawns on my little brain to empty the dishwasher. So without being asked I emptied the dishwasher and then I stick around because I want to see what happens. My wife comes in and she's like [la la-la, la la] and she goes to empty the dishwasher and goes, "Ah! You emptied the dishwasher!" And she comes up to me, "You're such a good husband!"
[Laughter]
See, I eat it up. By all rights she could have said, "Well, it’s about stinking time! I do this every day! You do it one time and you want a reward? Whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo!"
[Laughter]
That's exactly the way a lot of women treat their husbands.
The women who do this realize these guys are drawn to doing things when they get appreciation.
Here is the deal.
[Laughing]
Women tend to only want to appreciate unexpected kindness. If it is unexpected they will light up. Oh! If it is expected -- splbb! Which is a problem!
Here is an example --
James: , you're on target! That's -- everybody go get the book!
Mark: Call now! How are we doing on time? We okay?
James: No, we're fine.
Mark: All right, so here is the way I can test it. If I go down to a local department store and see a woman coming with her husband in tow, if I, as a complete stranger, open the door for her, she goes, "Oh, thank you very much!" But if her husband, the love of her life, the father of her , opens the door for her it is like, "Hurry up! Get out of the way!" They don't respond much. That's when they get themselves in trouble.
Women have to actually go out of the way to think beyond just the unexpected.
Now, I challenge men, get a clue, women like unexpected. Try to find unexpected things. I told my guys, I want to write a book, “365 Unexpected Things A Man Can Do for A Woman.” Then I thought about it, “52 Unexpected Things --,”
I don't know what I was thinking -- it was a weak moment, brother! It was a weak moment. I slipped there for a minute.
Women love unexpected -- but if you only respond to unexpected you'll find that he will quit being as responsive to you.
And then finally, number five: barter with him -- barter with him. Men love to barter; it is the language of men. Most seminars beat up on guys for not learning the language of women. Forget about it! If women will learn the language of men they can succeed and it is very simple.
You are aware of something he wants to do and you have something you want him to do for you, so you say, "Honey, would you like to do this thing you would like to do?"
And he goes, "Yeah."
"Well, do this for me and you can do that."
Most men love that but women are very offended by it. They say, "That's just manipulation."
No, no! To a man that is motivation.
[Laughing]
I get static from women and some pastors for saying the kind of things I just said because they believe you shouldn't have to have any kind of reward system to get men to act a certain way. "That is unscriptural -- it is very unbiblical. If you really love God --." But it is all baloney.
God has always dealt with men with incentive. From the very beginning God says if you do this I'll give you that. If you do this I'll give you that. You don't do this I'll kick your butt! So we see it. Right? Heaven and hell, pretty big incentive program going. Right? Even in the book of Revelation, "To him who overcomes, I will give him this. If you'll overcome, I'll give you that." Over and over and over again he says it.
One day Jesus says to these men, "Give." If he had been talking to women he would have been done. Right?
The reason the Bible is so thick is it is written for men. You need to get all of the incentives in. So, one word for the command, "Give."
Then he goes into "And it shall be given to you pressed down, shaken --." 36 words for the promise, one word for the command.
Don't tell me that it is unscriptural to use incentive to motivate men. God has always condemned a lot of things about men but never his need for reward. I try to get women to understand because they don't talk about this in these women's conferences. I've been to them; I call them "Estrogen Fests."
James: Do you want to say thanks to Mark Gungor.
I appreciate you, Mark!
There is too much for one program. We're going to talk to him in another program about the way women think and the way men think. It is in the book and in the DVD.
There is Mark's web site.
My face hurts. This is good! He is making a point and he will drive it home.
I hope you will get the book. It is very pointed and clear and I'm telling you, if you're prudish and you're just too goody two shoes to hear the truth, well, you probably wouldn't want the book.
But if you say, "Let's really tell the truth and let's deal with the issues," well, Mark can help you. So I hope you will get the book.
Mark Gungor: Women don't understand it! She’ll see her husband in that glorious vegetative state --
[Laughter]
Narrator: Laugh your way to a better marriage -- tomorrow!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Week 32
8/05/08
Betty: Thank you so much for joining us on LIFE Today. I'm Betty Robison and this is James.
James: And do you think Mark Gungor is a pretty funny guy?
Betty: He is funny but he says a lot of good things that are helpful about marriage.
James: It is not just comedy. It is just that he is taking very real issues that people are crying about and thinking, “I've got to cry about it.” He's making us laugh about it. It is called, "Laugh Your Way to a Better Marriage." This is the title of a seminar that Mark will teach anywhere that the doors are open.
You say, "Well, we really are serious about helping marriage situations and getting people happy." And most marriages don't seem to be happy; half of them ending in divorce and the other half that are sticking in there seem to be absolutely miserable.
And I'm telling you, Mark, he doesn't make you laugh while he is teaching you, he teaches. It is absolutely incredible. He deals with the issues that most people don't even want to talk about.
Then he's got DVD's that cover the seminar and we'll tell you how you can get them.
But Mark is back with us and he is going to talk about a tale of two brains and about how men and women think. As he said in an earlier program, "it is impossible for men to understand women." It is impossible, basically. But he tried to give women some understanding of men because it helps.
Betty: They're a lot simpler.
James: Did you think that he made some really good points?
Betty: Oh, I got some good points. [Laughing]
James: Here is Mark Gungor. Would you welcome him back to LIFE Today?
Mark, it’s good to see you. Let's carry on with how to laugh your way to a better marriage.
You called one of the segments and sessions, "The Tale of Two Brains." What are you referencing?
Mark: That men and women tend to think very differently from each other. The reason this is significant is because we are very quick to make into heart problems what are essentially head problems.
In other words, a man thinks and acts and responds in a certain way. A woman doesn't understand it. She assumes he has a bad heart but it is not his heart, it is his head.
It is the same with women. Women think and act a certain way, a guy doesn't understand it. He thinks she doesn't care about me, she doesn't respect me. Again, it is not her heart, it is her head.
So I try to show couples that if they'll understand how they think very differently from each other, it helps in the process of succeeding with one another.
The truth is, once you understand why somebody does what they do, it changes everything. If you don't understand the why, you're only threatened by it.
James: Does it make it right what they're doing because now you understand why they do these --?
Mark: It depends on what the doing is. I mean if they're beating you up, obviously, that is not right.
But a lot of what we do in marriages is not a matter of right and wrong, it is just that they don't like it. It messes with you, and in a way it is supposed to mess with you.
One of the fundamental keys of Christianity is that we're supposed to die to ourselves. Right? We're not supposed to be selfish. How often Jesus spoke about picking up your cross and dying to yourself and a grain of seed falling into the earth and if it doesn't die, it abides alone, all of that.
I preached a message in my church not long ago entitled, "God Wants to Kill You." All right? Not the real you, but the selfish you. And there is nothing more designed to kill you than marriage -- [Laughing] because if you stay selfish, you cannot do it -- you cannot survive.
The reality is that most of the doings that we struggle with is just things we don't like. "I don't like the way she does it." "I don't like the way he does that." Rrwr rwrr rrwr rrrw, we go crazy with each other.
James: You wonder why you ever married.
Mark: Well, I know why I did. [Laughing]
James: You do? Why?
Mark: She is cute, man! I was highly motivated -- praise God! This is a whole other sermon. We can talk on that for a month.
Anyway, so I start to talk about trying to get men and women to understand each other. What I describe is basic stereotypes. In other words, men generally think this way and women generally think this way but they don't all think that way. So I challenge people to interpolate for their own relationships.
One of the challenges of doing this is when you start describing every man in the world you have to use a pretty big brush. You know what I'm saying? -- Or every woman. But there are enough similarities that they kind of stand up. So I try and get couples to understand each other and how they think.
I start with men's brains. I explain that men's brains are made up of little boxes and we have a box for everything. We have a box for the car. We have a box for the money. We have a box for the job, a box for the , a box for you, a box for your mother somewhere in the basement.
[Laughter]
And the rule is the boxes do not touch. All right? When a man discusses a particular subject, he goes to the appropriate box, slides it out, opens it up, will discuss only the content of that particular box and then when he is done, he puts it away hoping not to touch or disturb any of the other boxes.
Now a woman's brain is made up of a big ball of wire. It is like the Internet super highway where everything is connected to everything. And the car is, -- [mumbling] -- and she will start talking about one thing. "And I thought about this and my mom told me this and I -- la la la la."
And of course, the guy is going --." [looking confused] "What box are you in, man?" Because he can't follow her because men don't do that. We start with the one subject.
But to women, everything is game because everything is connected to everything. Now all of this is driven by energy that we call emotion. Jggg jggg jggg jggg jggg. It is one of the reasons why women tend to remember everything. Because it is a scientific fact if you take an event and connect it to an emotion, it will burn into your memory and you can remember it forever.
Betty: Is that good?
Mark: Yeah. Oh, it is good. The same thing happens for men, it just doesn't happen very often because quite frankly, we don't care.
[Laughter]
Women tend to care about everything!
Now we men have a box in our brains that most women are completely unaware of. This particular box has nothing in it. It is true.
Betty: Women can probably tell you that.
[Laughing]
Mark: In fact, we call it the "nothing box." And of all the boxes a man has in his brain, our nothing box is our favorite box! If a man has the opportunity, he will go to his nothing box every time. That's why a man can do something seemingly completely brain dead for hours on end. You know, like fishing.
James: Oh, it is wonderful!
Mark: It is wonderful! Isn't it? Think about absolutely nothing!
And women don't understand this and it drives them crazy because nothing irritates a woman more than to witness a man doing nothing. Correct? Then she gets mad at him and quits talking to him.
Betty: I've fished with James quite a bit and I through the years have enjoyed fishing. But I tell him to come get me when the fish are biting, not to sit there all day and wait for them to bite, like he does. When they're really biting --.
James: You've got to make them bite.
Betty: But he thinks that's just wonderful!
Mark: It is the process of just doing nothing, thinking about nothing, reflecting about nothing. Women don't understand it.
She will see her husband in that glorious vegetative state --
[Laughter]
-- and she will come up to him and say, "What are you thinking about?"
And he'll go, "Nothing!"
And she gets mad! "Well, you've got to be thinking about something!"
"No, I'm thinking about nothing. In fact, I was on a roll 'til you showed up!"
And women get really, really mad at their husbands because they're convinced, James, they're convinced we're withholding from them some deep emotional thought.
[Laughter]
Nope, nothing! There ain't nothing there, man!
Now, a few years ago the University of Pennsylvania did a study with men's brains and women's brains and discovered that men, in fact, have the ability to think about absolutely nothing and still breathe.
[Laughter]
In fact, they say, up to 70% of a man's brain activity just goes -- ddzzt, naiaiah -- and we love it.
But women, they can't stop, their brains are constantly going [ddjt-ddjt-ddjt-ddjt]. They don't understand it. They can't relate to it. "How can you sit there and do nothing? What's the matter with you? What are you thinking about? What do you mean nothing? Come on!" And they get really bitter because they're convinced we're holding out on them.
When women understand that this is normal for men, he is not withholding from you, he is not robbing from you some great, deep, emotional truth, he is just a man, then they quit feeling so threatened by the behavior.
Again, if you don't know why somebody does something we start judging each other. Judging is when somebody does something and you don't know why they do it and then you give the reason why. It is called judging.
Why did he do that?
"Because he is a big fat stinking jerk! -- That's why!"
Well, you don't know that! Okay?
But we're filling in motives. And when you get into filling in motives, that's when we get ourselves in all kinds of trouble. Then women get mad and they quit talking to their husbands, which is kind of funny if you think about it.
A woman, in an effort to punish a man,
[Laughter]
-- stops talking to him.
[Laughter]
It is like giving a bottle to a wino. He thinks, “This is great! I must be doing something right! Praise God! She's quiet.”
We don't understand and we start getting in all kinds of trouble. This effects how men and women handle stress.
When a man is stressed out, for example, the last thing in the world he wants to do is talk about it. He doesn't want to talk about it. He just wants to go to his nothing box and just chill out. Because this is how we unwind. We just want to get to a place where we think about nothing.
But women are very different. When a woman is stressed out she has to talk about it. If she doesn't talk about it, her brain will explode. And then you've got brain everywhere and it is just disgusting!
Actually, the truth is, I saw a study in January that said if women do not talk when they're under stress it will physically damage their heart. It will increase their chance of stroke or heart attack. They have to talk about it.
But men get very nervous when women start talking about all their problems. I know guys who run from their wives when they do this. They'll start getting upset, "I don't like this -- Eyaya." And they run from her.
I said, "Why do you run?"
He said, "I don't know what to tell her." Because that is the mistake men do. They think when a woman shares her problems they're obligated to help fix it.
But she doesn't want you to fix it. In fact, if you try and fix her, she is going to kill you.
[Laughter]
She doesn't want your advice.
That is hard for a man to understand because a man only shares his problems with another man in hopes the man will help fix it.
But she doesn't want you to fix it; she just wants you to hear it. She is trying to talk it through, [la la la la.]
Now stop and think about how we get ourselves in trouble. They love each other. Right? So a man senses his wife is stressed out. He loves the girl so he offers to the girl his best answer to stress, "Quit thinking about it."
[Laughter]
"Quit talking about it."
That's when she starts reaching for the knives... to stab you to death.
But women do the same thing. A woman senses that her husband is stressed out. She loves the boy, she cares -- so she offers to him her best solution to stress, "Talk to me! Why won't you talk to me? James, talk to me!"
And he doesn't want to talk to you. He's running for his life.
James: What do you see happen when you do a seminar, and when people read the book? What do you hope happens to the couple and what do you see happen that is gratifying to you?
Mark: When they start understanding the why, it changes everything. I tell in my book the story of a young boy. Throughout all his life his chore was to feed grandpa his lunch. Grandpa was in a wheelchair. It was always a chore because he was a slob; he couldn't eat very well. He was kind of messy.
By the time the became a he had had it. He came in and announced to his mom one day, "I'm not doing this anymore. From now on, you feed grandfather."
And she said, "Well, you're a young man now. Sit down and I want to tell you why your grandfather is the way he is today.”
“There was a fire when you were a little boy. Your daddy thought you were upstairs with me and I thought you were downstairs with him. We both ran out.”
“It was your grandfather, who was visiting at the time, that was the first to realize you weren't there. In a split second he ran back into the house. He found you, wrapped you in wet cloths, and went through all these flames to get out. And of course, he was severely damaged because of saving your life that day. He is the way he is today because of the day he saved your life."
Well, instantaneously that teenaged boy goes, without another word, and from then on just did his chore.
When you understand why things are the way they are, it helps. It changes everything while at the same time changing nothing.
Steven Covey tells this story about how he was -- I'm not sure I got it exactly right but in essence he was on a subway train in New York City. They come to the stop and this guy hops on this train with his three . He sits down next to Covey and just throws his head back and closes his eyes and the train takes off.
Well, the are hellions; they're bothering everybody, hitting newspapers, running all over the place. Everybody is highly irritated at this guy.
Finally Covey says to them, "Dude, can't you take care of your ?"
And he sat up and he goes, "I'm so sorry, everybody. We just came from the hospital; their mother just died and I guess we're not handling it very well."
Well, what happens? Everything changes in the car even though nothing really changed at all. The were still problematic but everybody understood the behavior and they worked to help the through it.
Again, when you understand why people behave the way they behave it changes the atmosphere. That's what happens at my seminar and that's what happens when people look at my materials or read the book.
James: Thank God.
Would you say thanks to Mark Gungor for what he shares? I really want to encourage you to get the book.
I found myself thinking as I read the book. My staff will point out, boy, he is pretty plain spoken about some things. And I would glance and read and think, you know this is really what the church and families need to talk about, and what's tearing families and marriages apart and how you deal with it and what your honest sincere pursuit or goal should be. Really, we should be able to laugh.
But you see, not only do we want that for you, God does. God wants that for you. And he sends people along like Mark and he will make you laugh. You've got to laugh at this guy. He is a wild and crazy guy but he makes sense. He is so straight to the point.
The book is in the bookstores. There is his web site. If you want to go online and say, "What does he have to offer?" Well, he has the whole seminar, "Laugh Your Way to a Better Marriage." It is broken out and this is a DVD on the "Tale of Two Brains."
There are four of these DVD's. You can find out how to get them and you may want to go online and communicate with him and say, "Could you come to our church or our community and do one of these seminars?"
I hope you will avail yourself of the opportunity of really laughing your way to a better relationship, discovering some truths that unlock all those things that are jammed and hidden and kept you apart, bring you together in oneness with God and one another.
Mark, I'm going to say thanks again.
You want to tell him thanks?
I really appreciate you!
( click on the photo to enlarge )
|
|
|
0
Comments
|
|
