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If You Don't Laugh at this....You're Dead Summary of Life GREAT TRUTHS THAT LITTLE HAVE LEARNED: 1) No matter how hard you try, you can't baptize cats. 2) When your mom is mad at your dad, don't let her brush your hair. 3) If your sister hits you, don't hit her back. They always catch the second person. 4) Never ask your 3-year old brother to hold a tomato. 5) You can't trust dogs to watch your food. 6) Don't sneeze when someone is cutting your hair. 7) Never hold a dust-buster and a cat at the same time. 8 ) You can't hide a piece of broccoli in a glass of milk. 9) Don't wear polka-dot underwear under white shorts. 10) The best place to be when you're sad is Grandpa's lap. GREAT TRUTHS THAT ADULTS HAVE LEARNED: 1) Raising teenagers is like nailing jelly to a tree. 2) Wrinkles don't hurt. 3) Families are like fudge...mostly sweet, with a few nuts. 4) Today's mighty oak is just yesterday's nut that held its ground. 5) Laughing is good exercise. It's like jogging on the inside. 6) Middle age is when you choose your cereal for the fiber, not the toy. GREAT TRUTHS ABOUT GROWING OLD 1) Growing old is mandatory; growing up is optional. 2) Forget the health food. I need all the preservatives I can get. 3) When you fall down, you wonder what else you can do while you're down there. 4) You're getting old when you get the same sensation from a rocking chair That you once got from a roller coaster. 5) It's frustrating when you know all the answers but nobody bothers to ask you the questions. 6) Time may be a great healer, but it's a lousy beautician. 7) Wisdom comes with age, but sometimes age comes alone. THE FOUR STAGES OF LIFE: 1 -- You believe in Santa Claus. 2 -- You don't believe in Santa Claus. 3 -- You are Santa Claus. 4 -- You look like Santa Claus. SUCCESS: At age 4 success is . . . Not peeing in your pants. At age 12 success is . . . Having friends. At age 17 success is . . Having a driver's license. At age 35 success is . . Having money. At age 50 success is . . . Having money. At age 70 success is . .. . Having a drivers license. At age 75 success is . . . Having friends. At age 80 success is . . . Not peeing in your pants. Pass this on to someone who could use a laugh. Always remember to forget the troubles that pass your way; BUT NEVER forget the blessings that come each day. Have a wonderful day with many smiles Take the time to live!!! Life is short. Dance naked And eat dessert first! ![]() Vincit Veritas~Truth Conquers |
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Hey Janice, love it!
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![]() Beloved Jim, Good to see you laughing. Remember it is great medicine, and jogging your inerds ! With Great Love & Blessings, Hiz4Ever † Vincit Veritas~Truth Conquers
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Hey Janice, love it! Beloved Leanne, Good to see you again. I have been keeping you in my prayers. Did you see the choco mug cake? With Great Love & Blessings, Hiz4Ever † YUMO5 Min Chocolate mug Cake Vincit Veritas~Truth Conquers
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Beloved Sister, So glad you had some laughs from this post. We know you aren't dead.... With Great Love & Blessings, Hiz4Ever † Vincit Veritas~Truth Conquers
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9/9/2008 5:40 am |
You know that feeling you get when you lean way back in a chair and you reach the point where you are going to fall over backwards? I feel THAT way all the time! Thanks for the laughs, HIZ
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You know that feeling you get when you lean way back in a chair and you reach the point where you are going to fall over backwards? I feel THAT way all the time! Thanks for the laughs, HIZ Beloved Steve, You are a riot, Brother! With Great Love & Blessings, Hiz4Ever † Vincit Veritas~Truth Conquers
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Beloved Sister, I hope that cat is de-clawed !!! Otherwise the arm that holds that cat is going to be mangled!!! With Great Love & Blessings, Hiz4Ever † Vincit Veritas~Truth Conquers
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