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mikecrcrn 50M
29 posts
7/9/2017 4:00 am
Empty Void

If you can never be happy when you are poor, then how can you
truly be happy when you are rich? - me

I've seen relationships come/go like the breeze! sometimes they
go because our expectations of the other are too high! Take my
last relationship - Please

we met online through E-Harmony by the 12th of September
she came down to the Lutheran Church in Hartford CT, to hear
the group I was in at the time lead worship


we talked for what seemed like for hours, she drove me home
then headed back to her home an hour away, During the course
of this relationship/courting period

It became clear we liked each other, things were good, few bumps
nothing major, There was, however, one thing wrong? Expectations
I understood she wanted me to work, get a car (eventually) even be
able to come out more often to see her

I did travel out her way via a bus, even took trips back to her
location. Staying quite often for long periods of time, That I
am afraid was not enough for her
it seemed to continually be about wanting more, An empty void
of things that could never fill the gap, she was really looking for?

April of last year,

She sent a Dear John text message, announcing that the relationship had to end, Rambled off a few things, As to why she felt it needed to end! But in the
end, it does not take material things to make one really happy

not a house, car, large bank account, A nice smile, Pretty looks,
Or buying of material possessions, Cars, diamonds, To make one

“Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moths and vermin destroy, and where thieves break in and steal. But store up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where moths and vermin do not destroy, and where thieves do not break in and steal. For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also. Matthew 6:19-21

My hope for you all is

To find the one you have been looking for? but do not fill the void
with the things you do not need, Enjoy the love you share with each
other. Let there be laughter, Joy, Peace, Not an empty void that can
never be filled by the things the world tells you, That you need in
order to have a successful, Long lasting marriage/life

mikecrcrn 50M
7 posts
7/15/2017 5:08 pm

    Quoting AmericanBliss:
    Hello Mike, it sounds like your lady wanted a give-and-take relationship with a stable man. I don't think that's too much for a single woman of calibre to ask for.

    When I was your age I did not have my life together. I also realized that in order for me to have a good man, I had to become a good woman. With God's help, continue to improve and the rest, including a nice lady, will perhaps fall into place.
Hello Bliss,

with her deep rooted issues! it would be hard for her to get into a real
give/take relationship because she wants everything NOW, I fear that
even when you give an inch she is not satisfied wanting the mile

which is why I wrote this blog the way I did

To demonstrate that we're the world full of emptiness, we get the new car we've always wanted, 6 months later? We're trading it in for something
else, we see this time/time again

relationships, jobs, the laundry list goes on and all for something that
in the end! can never make us happy

This is why I quoted Matthew 6:19-21

because that is where we find true happiness, Not in the things the world
says we can have but we'll be miserable while having it! Sadly she is just
a worldly girl with lots to learn yet

Perhaps one day she will mature enough till then it's just not her
day to be in love, with a person who can be better than anything
this world has to offer

geusnuevavida 58F
22 posts
7/16/2017 3:15 pm

Blessings, Mickecrcrn, Interesting story, The will of God in relationships, is that they contribute to mutual spiritual edification, and according to the purposes that He has designed for each one. The spiritual man or woman has his eyes on things above and not on those of the world and has as a priority the service to the Lord, trusting that He will add the additions.
The woman you talk about in history is a woman who is looking for additions. As the Bible says, where your treasure is, there your heart will also be. Luke 12:34.

mikecrcrn replies on 7/19/2017 6:05 pm:
I agree with you Geusnuevavida

she does have her eyes set on the world below
people must remember, she is still in the stage
of infancy, while I on the other hand? am running
like the breeze.

I have more faith, trust God works it out! while she
frets/sins worrying if it will ever change? Maybe it
was not a good match, I don't know, my hope is that
she will learn to be more trusting than feeling like
she has to do everything herself

the last thing God wants

Is for us sticking our hands in something he is well
in control of, Either he lives on the throne of the heart, Or you do? there can't be 2 masters

thanks for the comment

Urban_Hermit 68M
317 posts
7/17/2017 2:34 am

To me it seems she was materialistic, I wont say a gold digger as she wouldnt have looked at you to begin with, however she wanted you elevated to a higher financial position. It seems to me in many cases men hope the woman they meet will never change, but the woman seem to always want to change the man, ask any married man. Dare I say it's about the money? Find someone who is happy with you as you are, if you cant dont worry. Single is less stressful in a lot of cases. When it comes to the later years of life why work yourself to death for another's agenda, especially if you are happy with your basic circumstances now. The Lord knows our needs. God bless.

Judgement Day will be interesting.

mikecrcrn 50M
7 posts
7/19/2017 2:46 pm

2 Timothy 3:2

People will be lovers of themselves, lovers of money, boastful, proud, abusive, disobedient to their parents, ungrateful, unholy, 3 without love, unforgiving, slanderous, without self-control, brutal, not lovers of the good, 4 treacherous, rash, conceited, lovers of pleasure rather than lovers of God—

this we see today because people covet what others want, they make materials the focus of the center, then allowing God to be the focus of
their life

The world tells us we're nothing without the cars, the money, nice
clothes, the great smile/looks, bank accounts, Yet we're miserable
inside again going back to the title of the blog

Empty Void

if in God we trust! then our focus should not be the things this
world can give us, it needs to be what he provides according
to all our needs even grace that is sufficient with mercy

Without that? we're done for! which is why we need to put
our trust more on him than ourselves or the world

Sojourner06 58M
1768 posts
7/19/2017 11:44 pm

Hi Mike & Urban.

- I'm just wondering what you expect from a woman being your spouse?
- and what's her purpose in your relationship/marriage?

And what's your own purpose in such a relationship/marriage?



I Can Explain It To You, But I Can’t Understand It For You

Good News For Christian Man ABP


mikecrcrn 50M
7 posts
7/20/2017 4:08 am

I expect Loyalty and faith I don't care if she is with/without
money, looks. cars fancy jewelry or apt, To me, none of these
are as equally as important as what I stated in the beginning

Sojourner06 58M
1768 posts
7/20/2017 4:42 pm

Hi Mike.

I think we all get that you want to make it clear for all to read and understand that you don't care for materialism.

But you only answered 33,3 % of my questions...

So let's try again. God created Adam, and afterwards He took a rib and created Eve, the woman. What's her purpose in a relationship/marriage according to your understand of the Bible?



I Can Explain It To You, But I Can’t Understand It For You

Good News For Christian Man ABP


Sojourner06 58M
1768 posts
7/22/2017 1:25 am

Hi Mike.

Regarding your statements on materialism (cars; money; nice clothes a.s.o ) I would like to ask you one more question: do you believe it's Biblically a sin to have a huge amount of money; nice cars for millions and a lot of nice clothes. And let's add a million dollar house/home?

Meaning if people are rich and wealthy they sin and they can't be real Spiritfilled Christians; followers of Christ?



I Can Explain It To You, But I Can’t Understand It For You

Good News For Christian Man ABP


Sojourner06 58M
1768 posts
7/27/2017 11:43 pm

Hi Mike.

I can see you visited BC on a regular basis the last week - meaning every day - and you also writes you are open to questions "or afraid to hear criticism."

So what happened since you haven't written even one word after I wrote my questions?
You see I don't think the problem was her but you. She isn't a materialistic woman, it's just you who miss a lot of basic information on who and what God created you to be as a man. And who and what God created women to be.

Said in other words she was looking for her prince and you told her you could be her tramp.
- and then of cause there is all your hurt feelings. So it's easier to criticize her than to admit you did it wrong.
So my suggestion is to take a look at creation of man in the Bible and find out what it really says.
And stop behaving like Adam when he was confronted with the story of the Apple. By the way where were he when Eve was tempted?



I Can Explain It To You, But I Can’t Understand It For You

Good News For Christian Man ABP