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You think you know someone About 8 years ago I was sitting at my computer and got an Instant Message thru my service. It was a man who was apparently lonely and looking for someone to talk to. Just so you know, whenever that has happened, I will give someone the benefit of the doubt and only NOT speak to them if the conversation turns unseemly. Well, this gentleman and I "saw" each other online nearly every day and would always befriend the other. It turned out that we were in high school together, one year apart. He had married his high school sweetheart who had passed from cancer the year before. Indeed, he was feeling lonely and I was more than happy to reach out to him with my friendship. My husband & I used to go to a place to shoot pool every Friday that turned out to be very close to this fellow's home, and after about 3 months of chatting online, I suggested he come to meet us face-to-face on a Friday evening. I'll never forget how uncomfortable and shy he looked that first time. Over the years, "Ed" (not his real name) and I and my (now) ex husband all became GOOD friends, double dating sometimes, meeting one another's (adult) & brothers, sisters and mothers, spending time in each others' kitchens, shooting pool, making new friends, encouraging, supporting and "being there" for each other. In the past 2 years or so, our friendship has kind of cooled; we no longer go and shoot pool regularly like we used to, and our contact with each other has lessened quite a bit. Today I read a news article that one of our mutual friends sent me about Ed's arrest this week. He met what he THOUGHT was a 15 year old girl on the internet back in October. Since then, they had exchanged emails & phone conversations which had become sexually explicit. He had asked her if her parents were aware that she was 'into' older men. This 'girl' turned out to be an undercover agent. He had crossed state lines to meet her at a hotel on Tuesday morning. There was a camera & condoms in his car. The maximum sentence is life in prison; minimum 10 years. He has totally screwed up his life. I am so shocked, dismayed and now am saying, "I'm a TERRIBLE judge of character". I truly believed Ed was a "real good guy" and so did my ex. Both of us are reeling from this shocking news. I think of his ; how they recently lost their mom, and now, essentially, they are losing their father too. The served in the Army for 4 years and is a fine, upstanding young man. His , delicate and sweet. I worry that Ed may be suicidal as he faces prison as a would-be pedophile. I want to reach out to him, but not having seen him much in recent years, I hesitate. I don't want to make it worse for him.  Walking, and praising and trusting my Lord for the rest of my life  |
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2/1/2010 4:07 pm |
My neighbor was recently arrested for molesting a 4 year old little girl. I would have never guessed it in a million years. he been over my house for haircuts- and took my trash out for me when i would forget. I thought he was a nice person -I've felt lead to pray for him. I hope he does come to repentance not to just feel guilty that he got caught
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I would love to be there for him, but he must feel so ashamed - he's not reaching back to us. We will, of course, continue to pray for him. Thanks for your post, Dave. Walking, and praising and trusting my Lord for the rest of my life
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Hi Sue, I ended up writing him an email, letting him know I am still his friend and would stand by him. Thanks! Donna Walking, and praising and trusting my Lord for the rest of my life
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That's truly horrible...Two things, actually, are horrible. The fact that he a child and that he only spent 13 months in prison. The minimum sentence in New York is 10 years. THAT is a severe sentence and sends the message, DO NOT MESS WITH CHILDREN! Walking, and praising and trusting my Lord for the rest of my life
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You are not a terrible judge of character. This man had a skeleton in his closet and sometimes people are just plain hard to read. Reaching out to him (I like countrygirl's idea of a letter) and/or his children might be something to think about. I'm so sorry. My best friend since high school married a man who turned out to be a pedophile. They've been divorced for nearly 20 years. I love her dearly and would never turn my back on her because of her choices. Again, I can't help but consider the innocent loved ones involved. Walking, and praising and trusting my Lord for the rest of my life
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I wonder if he's hurt any children before they caught him. There was a pediphile in my family and they never changed. I would never trust this friend, but his soul needs saved. Sometimes prison is what God uses to reach someone. Happens alot. I pray God's will in his life, and His guidance for you in this situation. Blessings, Robin Walking, and praising and trusting my Lord for the rest of my life
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Thanks Countrygirl - I ended up sending him a letter (an email) and I haven't heard back. I let him know that I'm not a 'fair-weather' friend, but I would stand by his side. Thank you for your prayers...I believe He heard and answered. Walking, and praising and trusting my Lord for the rest of my life
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1/8/2010 5:11 pm |
You are not a terrible judge of character. This man had a skeleton in his closet and sometimes people are just plain hard to read. Reaching out to him (I like countrygirl's idea of a letter) and/or his children might be something to think about. I'm so sorry. My best friend since high school married a man who turned out to be a pedophile. They've been divorced for nearly 20 years. I love her dearly and would never turn my back on her because of her choices. Again, I can't help but consider the innocent loved ones involved.
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1/8/2010 4:41 pm |
I wonder if he's hurt any children before they caught him. There was a pediphile in my family and they never changed. I would never trust this friend, but his soul needs saved. Sometimes prison is what God uses to reach someone. Happens alot. I pray God's will in his life, and His guidance for you in this situation. Blessings, Robin   "Love is Patient..."
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