My Ideal Person:
I consider myself quite a catch with my varying interest in parasitic psychology and my keen interest in mule dentistry.Couple this with my girlish charles manson looks, my groovy false teeth and you got yourself one fine mess,I mean catch.I lead an active social life with my 7 times a week AA meetings and meetings with my parole officer.That’s right guys most days a week I can only go to and from work,(I’m a grave robber, uhm I mean digger) but on Sat and Sun nights look out baby, I got a whole 4 hours before I have to report in.So whether its a romantic night of drunken cow tipping, or a sensual night of shoplifting down at K-mart(hey they won’t miss anything they are bankrupt anyway) besides nothing keeps a couple together like grand larceny.But a really ideal date would be you, me and heroin, no make that crack,its much cheaper.People seem to think I'm odd but I don’t agree, its not like I sit around when the lights are out making barnyard animal noises or yell at my make believe cat. Well ok I did it once sue me.My hobby's include collecting roadkill and determining the cause of death, and working on my fully operational meth lab, I just need a thousand boxes of decongestant to get started. My doctors say as long as I avoid alcohol my urge to strip naked and bark and the moon should stop, eventually.Sometime I do think the carpet is talking to me but that has pretty much stopped since they raised my prozac to 8000 mgs.I do aspire to higher, more lofty goals, but after some intense moments I eventually got off the ledge and came back in the window.My health is pretty good considering the shape I'm in, (yet to be determined what it is)
I thought I had lost my hair but I found it, it was on my back the whole time.I have been outbreak free for a week now and the sores have crusted over. Well
guys if a romantic 7 course meal(a six pack of beer and a bag of doritos)sounds good to you, then please call my shrink and locate whatever mental facility I am currently confined to,they say I have to go now and take the purple pill. If you want you can leave a message at the beep………..BEEP!!!
Hey people who live in glass houses shouldn't’t walk around nude.
(Just in case there are those who believe this is how I really am, calm down it's just a joke.)See what a lifetime of L.S.D. and draino can do to the human mind?

Things I’ve learned from internet dating:

1. There are lots of really nice people on this site. There are also some complete lunatics.
2. Lots of people don't know the difference between "your" and "you're."
3. Most people don't know that the phrase "A lot" is two separate words.
4. It is very difficult for everyone (myself included) to categorize their own body type with the available choices.
5. Once you're out of college, it is increasingly difficult to meet people--especially if you're not into the "bar scene."
6. You can tell within five minutes of meeting someone whether or not you want to see them again. If you don't, you can be in for a really long evening (or an awkward climb out of a bathroom window).
7. I am stunned by the number of people that have a race requirement.
8. Women and Men are sometimes really uncomfortable chatting with a younger and really old guy, even if it's only a few years.
9. You can all stop writing that you love to have fun. There aren’t any profiles out there that say, "You know what I hate? Fun."
10. Spell check exists for a reason.!!!!

I have a brother who is in navy/army a son in the army and a daughter in the navy and hubbys in the army so this poem is very special prayer for all current and past military .............

This is a very special prayer that I wrote for those who have and still serve this great country.
OUR HEAVENLY FATHER,
EMBRACE THOSE HEROES WHO FELL IN THE NAME OF FREEDOM,
COMFORT THOSE VALIANT ONES WHO FOUGHT THE BRAVE FIGHT FOR JUSTICE,
BLESS THOSE WHO STILL STAND AND FIGHT TO THIS DAY IN THE NAME OF HONOR,
PLEASE LORD OPEN THE HEAVENS AND RAIN PEACE UPON THIS EARTH ,
AND WASH AWAY THE STAIN OF WAR FROM THIS WORLD FOREVER.
AMEN.
IF YOU HAVE READ THIS FAR THEN HOPEFULLY YOU WILL SEE ME DIFFERENT THAN WHEN YOU FIRST LOOKED AT MY PICTURE AND WRITE ME,IF NOT GOD BLESS.qout;
(PS...feel free let me know what u think of the profile lol )

OH AND I AM NOT GAY!! IV GOTTEN FEW GAY EMAILS LOL I AM STRAIGHT GO AWAY LOL
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