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Mujibar's job interview:
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Mar 23, 2006 7:45 am
997 Views
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Mujibar's job interview:
Mujibar was trying to get a job in India.
The Personnel Manager said, "Mujibar, you have passed all the tests, except one. Unless you pass it you cannot qualify for this job."
Mujibar said, "I am ready."
The manager said, "Make a sentence using the words Yellow, Pink and Green."
Mujibar thought for a few minutes and said, "Mister manager, I am ready."
The manager said, "Go ahead."
Mujibar said, "The telephone goes green, green, green, and I pink it up, and say, 'Yellow, this is Mujibar.'"
Mujibar now works as a Dell technician at a call center for computer problems.
No doubt you have spoken to him. I have on several occasions.
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What A Women Wants In A Man!
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Mar 22, 2006 4:10 pm
965 Views
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What A Women Wants In A Man!
What A Women Wants In A Man!, Original List:
1. Handsome
2. Charming
3. Financially successful
4. A caring listener
5. Witty
6. In good shape
7. Dresses with style
8. Appreciates finer things
9. Full! of thoughtful surprises
10. An imaginative, romantic lover
What A Women Wants In A Man!, Revised List (age 32):
1. Nice looking
2. Opens car doors, holds chairs
3. Has enough money for a nice dinner
4. Listens more than talks
5. Laughs at my jokes
6. Carries bags of groceries with ease
7. Owns at least one tie
8. Appreciates a good home-cooked meal
9. Remembers birthdays and anniversaries
10. Seeks romance at least once a week
What A Women Wants In A Man!, Revised List (age 42):
1. Not too ugly
2. Doesn't drive off until I'm in the car
3. Works steady - splurges on dinner out occasionally
4. Nods head when I'm talking
5. Usually remembers punch lines of jokes
6. Is in good enough shape to rearrange the furniture
7. Wears a shirt that covers his stomach
8. Knows not to buy champagne with screw-top lids
9. Remembers to put the toilet seat down
10. Shaves most weekends
What A Women Wants In A Man!, Revised List (age 52):
1. Keeps hair in nose and ears trimmed
2. Doesn't belch or scratch in public
3. Doesn't borrow money too often
4. Doesn't nod off to sleep when I'm venting
5. Doesn't retell the same joke too many times
6. Is in good enough shape to get off couch on weekends
7. Usually wears matching socks and fresh underwear
8. Appreciates a good TV dinner
9. Remembers your name on occasion
10. Shaves some weekends
What A Women Wants In A Man!, Revised List (age 62):
1. Doesn't scare small children
2. Remembers where bathroom is
3. Doesn't require much money for upkeep
4. Only snores lightly when asleep
5. Remembers why he's laughing
6. Is in good enough shape to stand up by himself
7. Usually wears some clothes
8. Likes soft foods
9. Remembers where he left his teeth
10. Remembers that it's the weekend
What A Women Wants In A Man!, Revised List (age 72):
1. Breathing !
2. Doesn't miss the toilet !
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Where's God?
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Mar 21, 2006 8:22 pm
982 Views
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The man whispered,
"God, speak to me"
and a meadowlark sang.
But, the man did not hear.
So the man yelled,
"God, speak to me"
and the thunder rolled across the sky.
But, the man did not listen.
The man looked around and said,
"God let me see you."
And a star shined brightly.
But the man did not see.
And, the man shouted,
"God show me a miracle."
And, a life was born.
But, the man did not notice.
So, the man cried out in despair,
"Touch me God, and let me know you are here."
Whereupon, God reached down and touched the man.
But, the man brushed the butterfly away and walked on.
God is always around us in the little,
and simple things that we take for granted ...
Rod
Lighten Up a bit...
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6
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Man -v- Woman
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Mar 21, 2006 9:44 am
986 Views
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A woman in a hot air balloon realized she was lost. She lowered her altitude and spotted a man in a boat below. She shouted to him, "Excuse me, can you help me? I promised a friend I would meet him an hour ago, but I don't know where I am."
The man consulted his portable GPS and replied, "You're in a hot air balloon, approximately 30 feet above a ground elevation of 2346 feet above sea level. You are at 31 degrees, 14.97 minutes north latitude and100 degrees, 49.09 minutes west longitude. She rolled her eyes and said, "Your a Typical Man." "I am," replied the man. "Why do you say that?" "Well," answered the balloonist, "everything you told me is technically correct, but I have no idea what to do with your information, and I'm still lost. Frankly, you've not been much help to me.
"The man smiled and responded, "Your a typical Woman." "I am," replied the balloonist. "And why do you say that?" "Well," said the man, "you don't know where you are or where you're going. You've risen to where you are, due to a large quantity of hot air. You made a promise that you have no idea how to keep, and you expect me to solve your problem. You're in exactly the same position you were in before we met, but, somehow, now it's my fault."
Don't you just love a good joke!...
Rod
Lighten Uo a bit...
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9
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Blog-babel:
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Mar 21, 2006 4:27 am
908 Views
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Blog-babel: When you start to comment to someones blog and then start going off about something else....
I could maybe be accused of this one a couple of times!...
Rod
Lighten Up a bit...
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1
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Lawnmower:
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Mar 20, 2006 10:27 pm
926 Views
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Lawnmower:
When our lawn mower broke and wouldn't run, my wife kept hinting to me that I should get it fixed. But, somehow I always had something else
to take care of first, the truck, the car, fishing, always something more important to me.
Finally she thought of a clever way to make her point. When I arrived home one day, I found her seated in the tall grass, busily snipping away with a tiny pair of sewing scissors. I watched silently for a short time and then went into the house. I was gone only a few minutes.
When I came out again I handed her a toothbrush. "When you finish cutting the grass," I said, "you might as well sweep the sidewalk."
Rod
Lighten Up a bit...
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3
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Blog-loged.....
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Mar 20, 2006 10:02 pm
870 Views
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Blog-loged: when the blogs are going too slow...
Don't ya just hate it when that happens?..
Rod
Lighten Up a bit...
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1
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Banjoblues Challenge to Rod....
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Mar 18, 2006 5:06 pm
957 Views
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First before I start I would like to say that I got Banjoblues permission to quote her in this post, and that I believe her to be a wonderful woman of God. OK with that said here is her challenge:
Banjoblues comment on one of my post:
"I think a lot of us would like to hear from you personally , rather than lots of blog words which some are quite cute, some out right funny, especially the Lighten up ones. But its very hard for members to make friends with a one word man. Tell the BC more about you, your Jesus, your life, your trials, your loved ones and what you need, or require, and throw in a Blog word at least once a week. You make a lot of friends when you share stories, poems and such. Be Blessed, and please believe this isn't meant to be judgmental, I am sure you have lots to offer to the potential thousand of friends you can have as well as your intelligence with the language. In Christ: "
I did not take her comment as judgmental, but I wasn't sure if what she said was true, so I replied to Banjoblues comment with this email:
"I did think about what what you said, but I wonder if what you say is true? If I'm here to meet a possible mate, would be wearing my feelings on my sleeve be the right thing to do? I hope I'm saying this right, because I don't mean that I should be a fake or act different than who I am... but does a woman find a man appealing if he shows his inner self (weakness). Doesn't a women want a man to be confident, funny and secure? (that is what I see on a lot of their profiles) Isn't the nice guy always the friend never the lover? I would really like to hear your opinion on this.. got to go.. Maybe I'll do a post on my blog about it?.. That is if you don't mind me quoting you!God bless"
Banjoblues did reply back to me with a lot of wisdom that I believe was a word from the Lord for me. I will not put her reply in this post because this post is already getting to be a bit Mind-blogging...lol
1st question is: For the ladies, am I right in believing that you don't find it appealing for a a man to show his inner feelings (weakness)? Please check your hearts and look at your past relationships and reply honestly.
2nd question: For the men, what is your experience with the ladies? Do you find that ladies are attracted to your openness to really share your inner feelings (weakness)? or do you find that you have to hold a bit of yourself back in fear of losing a womens affection?
Please take a moment before you reply to this post, because I really want to know what is true, not the way you think it should be!.... Thanks...
Rod
Lighten Up a bit...
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6
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Squirrels in The Church:
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Mar 17, 2006 6:18 pm
Mood: weird,
839 Views
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Squirrels in The Church:
A small town had four churches Presbyterian, Methodist, Catholic and Baptist.
All four had a serious problem with squirrels in the church. Each church in its own fashion had a meeting to deal with the problem.
The Presbyterians decided that it was predestined that squirrels be in the church and that they would just have to live with them.
The Methodists decided they should deal with the squirrels lovingly in the style of Charles Wesley. They humanely trapped them and released them in a park at the edge of town. Within 3 days, they were all back in the church.
The Catholics also humanely trapped them and attempted to teach them the "rhythm" method which of course did not work.
The Baptists had the best solution. They voted the squirrels in as members. Now they only see them at Christmas and Easter.
You got to love them Baptist.....
Rod
Lighten Up a bit...
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