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My tears will wash His feet.

Outpourings of my heart and soul that take various forms.

Thoughts about being patient...
Posted:Sep 10, 2006 4:38 pm
Last Updated:Jan 12, 2007 9:53 am
2460 Views

Psalm 27:14 NLT - Wait patiently for the LORD. Be brave and courageous. Yes, wait patiently for the LORD.

Psalm 40:1, NLT - I waited patiently for the LORD to help me, and he turned to me and heard my cry.

Romans 12:12 NLT - Rejoice in our confident hope. Be patient in trouble, and keep on praying.

2 Thessalonians 3:5 NLT - May the Lord lead your hearts into a full understanding and expression of the love of God and the patient endurance that comes from Christ.
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Thinking about love...
Posted:Sep 10, 2006 11:52 am
Last Updated:May 13, 2024 2:6 pm
2306 Views

I liked the sermon at church today, but at the same time I didn’t like how it made me feel. It was on the teaching that women should submit to their husbands, and husbands should love their wives as Christ loved the church. Now, some people have a problem with the word submit, but I think of it this way; that a wife should yield to her husband as the chief decision-maker of the family. Let him “wear the pants” so to speak. But at the same time, the husband should love his wife at least as much as he loves himself; to respect her opinions and desires. If they both put the other first, how could a marriage ever go wrong? But what I didn’t like, were the feelings it brought up. What happens when a wife submits, but a husband doesn’t love her? This simply can’t work when it’s one-sided. I submitted to my ex and I tried to get him to love me again, but after so long, I suppose I just gave up. And now I’m left with this empty feeling, wondering what I did wrong. Why did he have to say and do such mean things to me? I didn't deserve it. I kind of wish I would have stayed home and had my own study/prayer time. But maybe I was supposed to reflect on this today for some reason. I don't know.
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I love you, Jesus
Posted:Sep 7, 2006 8:54 pm
Last Updated:Sep 10, 2006 11:51 am
2341 Views
Thoughts of You
by Barlow Girl

Thoughts of You and how You changed me
Fill my mind
Without you where would I be

See even though I've tried to express my thanks
It never comes out I hoped
I want to say so much more,
so with these simple words
I'll try

I love you
my heart is yours, only yours
I long to give you all of me
My everything, my everything

God I never could repay you
You gave everything
Without you where would I be

You still love me even when I
Pushed you away
You stood there and waited
Till the day I'd return

I love you, Jesus
my heart is yours, only yours
I long to give you all of me
My everything, my everything
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A Nebraska Poem
Posted:Sep 3, 2006 9:19 pm
Last Updated:Sep 7, 2006 8:34 pm
2523 Views
Smack dab in the middle of our great nation,
Is a state that requires a little explanation.
To east and west coasters who'll come right out and ask ya
"Is there anything of interest in the State of Nebraska?"

It's true we don't have mountains all decked out in snow,
But we do have the world's biggest live chicken show.
We're the makers of Spam. We invented Kool-Aid,
And this is where the first Reuben sandwich was made.

Our insect, the Honeybee. Our bird, the Meadowlark.
The strobe light, our creation, works best in the dark.
Governmentally speaking, we're a freak of nature.
Since we have the only one-house legislature.

On Arbor Day, when you plant a tree,
Remember that it started in Nebraska City.
We were once called a desert, but that name didn't take,
Since we have the country's largest underground lake.

We have the world's largest forest planted by hand,
And more miles of rivers than any state in the land.
The College World Series calls Omaha "home,"
And yes, this is where the buffalo used to roam.

We were the first state in the nation to finish our Interstate section,
And the first to run two women in the gubernatorial election.
We invented 9-1-1 emergency communication,
And we're the number one producer of center pivot irrigation.

Our woolly mammoth fossil is the largest ever found,
And our monumental "Carhenge" is certain to astound.
We have several museums that could be called odd,
Dedicated to Chevy's, fur trading, roller skates and sod.

In Blue Hill, Nebraska, no woman wearing a hat,
Can eat onions in public. Imagine that!
We built the largest porch swing and indoor rain forest,
And we came up with the yellow that's used for school buses.

So pack up the kiddies, the pets and the wife,
And see why Nebraska is called
"THE GOOD LIFE."

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When I am troubled...
Posted:Sep 3, 2006 9:10 pm
Last Updated:Sep 7, 2006 8:44 pm
2474 Views
When I am in distress, dear Lord, I ask you to listen to the cry of my heart. I neither can nor will prescribe the time and the way in which my distress might be removed. I will wait for you to determine the when and how of my relief. Strengthen my faith and give me patience to bear my trouble so that at last I may be glad when you visit me with your grace and remove my distress. Dear Father, you have never forsaken your ; do not forsake me now. You cheer the hearts of your despairing ; lift me up at your appointed time. I leave all to your wisdom, love, understanding, and goodness. Amen.
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I'm grateful...
Posted:Aug 29, 2006 8:57 pm
Last Updated:Aug 30, 2006 4:11 pm
2242 Views

Sometimes I let thoughts of what I'm missing get the upperhand and it helps to write down my feelings. I'm so grateful for this website. This blog is a place where I can pour my heart out to caring people and not have to fear that I'll be judged or looked down on. God certainly blesses us in unexpected ways! I just need to remember that, and know that to all things there is a season; and all things happen according to His divine will.
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Love song to Jesus
Posted:Aug 29, 2006 8:41 pm
Last Updated:Aug 30, 2006 4:11 pm
2204 Views
I Need You To Love Me
by Barlow Girl

Why, why are You still here with me?
Didn't You see what I've done?
In my shame I want to run, and hide myself yeah
But it's here I see the truth
I don't deserve You

And I need You to love me, and I
I won't keep my heart from You this time
And I'll stop this pretending that I can
Somehow deserve what I already have
I need you to love me

I, I have wasted so much time
Pushing You away from me
I just never saw how you, could cherish me
'Cause You're a God who has all things
And still You want me

And I need You to love me, and I
I won't keep my heart from You this time
And I'll stop this pretending that I can
Somehow deserve what I already have
I need you to love me
Yeah, Yeah, Yeah

Your love makes me forget what I have been
Your love makes me see who I really am
Your love makes me forget what I have been
Woah-Oh-Oh

And I need you to love me yeah
I need you to, love me, yeah yeah yeah
And I'll stop this pretending that I can
Somehow deserve what I already have
I need you to love me
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Why?
Posted:Aug 28, 2006 8:40 pm
Last Updated:Aug 29, 2006 8:44 pm
2326 Views

Why can't it be enough for me to know that God loves me? Why do I feel such a strong need to be held and told that I matter to someone? I know that God loves me and accepts me as I am. Why isn't that enough? Sometimes the need to be loved by someone is so overwhelming. I also know that God has a reason for me to go through this, but sometimes it is so hard just to stand up in this valley. I pray for forgiveness, and for strength, but still the tears come pouring down and I go to sleep lonely again.
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Here's an inspirational verse that I like...
Posted:Jul 25, 2006 8:10 pm
Last Updated:Jul 26, 2006 5:08 am
2248 Views

The good you do today may be forgotten tomorrow.
Do good anyway.

If you are successful, you may win false friends.
Succeed anyway.

If you are kind, you may be accused of having ulterior motives.
Be kind anyway.

Sometimes the best you have to give is not enough.
Give your best anyway.

If you find serenity and happiness, people may be jealous.
Be happy anyway.

Live in such a way that those who know you but don't know God,
will come to know God because they know you.
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I've said it before, but it bears repeating; Jesus is the air that my heart breathes!
Posted:Jul 25, 2006 8:07 pm
Last Updated:Aug 28, 2006 8:43 pm
2271 Views

My stepmom's doing much better, she may even return home within a week and a half-2 weeks. She's in rehab and gaining strength and here's a good sign; my Dad says she's getting feisty again! The convalescent home where she's at had run out of washcloths, and boy did she let them know how she felt about that with the high cost of health care!

It was so hot last week. I was very glad that the high on Saturday was 85, especially since were outside all day at the Shrine Bowl activities with a group of girls. The weather was absolutely beautiful!

You know, I don’t really have to do all the parades, fundraisers and activities with the girls, most of the moms just drop their daughters off. But I want to spend as much time as I possibly can with mine this year because once she goes off to college, so goes my friend, my muse, my comedienne and reality check. We will never again get to spend as much time together as we can this next year. She is the song that my heart sings and I'm both excited and sad thinking about her leaving home.

I've had a few years now to become accustomed to my being on his own and I'm proud of the integrity and character he's developed. He is the beat of my heart. Wow, my heart is fairly musical! Now if I only had a little guitar in there…
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