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No More Dogs (from a women’s point of view).
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Sep 8, 2007 12:40 pm
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We all desire to be desired. Any good-looking man or women will be desired by the opposite sex. A woman doesn’t even have to be good-looking to be desired by dogs. Just because a guy desires you doesn’t mean you are desirable it just means he has a lust problem. A hungry person will eat things they don’t like just because they are hungry, same with a dog. A man that will have sex with a woman and not care what she looks like, he just needs a place to do his thing is a dog. When a male dog is around a female dog in heat, the male is in another world. You can give commands, you can smack him and he doesn’t respond. All he does is keep his eyes on the female, panting until he is able to mount and so his thing. This is because they are animals.
Unfortunately there are men who act the same way they are out of control. The sadist thing about that statement is some of these men are Christian men who go to church on a regular basis, they are ushers, choir members etc…
When I first became single after 30 years of marriage, I learned fast that when a man pays attention to you or communicates that you are desirable, in most of those cases, only desirable for sex. Is that really the way we Christian women want to be desired? Not this one. I have decided that I no longer just desire to be desired. I want only to be desired by my Boaz whoever he may be. Listen, we need to say enough with the dogs… I am a human woman, NO MORE DOGS!
I am now more conscious of my beauty in Christ, adorning the hidden man of the heart, rather than my outer beauty. If a man can’t desire me because I am godly then I don’t want anything to do with him. If he can’t get past my outer beauty and get excited about my destiny then he is not for me.
Ladies, see yourself as the beauty you are… let the dogs pant and lust if they must but you keep walking as the beautiful women, whole and pure, that you are and your Boaz will be waiting just around the corner. Keep yourself for him. Those of you who desire to remarry live as you are married keeping yourself for your mate who longs for you as much as you do him.
THINK ABOUT IT!!
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Why Settle for a Proverbs 31 Woman When You Can Have More?
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Sep 8, 2007 12:37 pm
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I didn’t have any idea why I didn’t fathom the concept of a Proverbs 31 woman. I have never had a desire to be one. It seemed to me that she fell short of what we are to be today as Christian women. While she was a women to be honored she wasn’t saved, she wasn’t filled with the Holy Spirit. She was on the other side of Christ. She was before Christ.
While men are crying for a Proverbs 31 woman, women are crying for a Boaz. Boaz was also before Christ. We were created in the image of God are we not supposed to aspire to be like Him through Christ. If men and women alike would allow Christ to be formed in them there would be no cry for what once was and never to be again. Boaz is not being formed in our men but Christ is. The Proverbs 31 woman is not being formed in women but Christ is. May I remind you that Boaz and the Proverbs 31 woman are both dead but Christ lives on in us. If single men and women would go after a Christ like mate, someone who has the fruit of the Spirit in operation or at least willing to conform to the fruit of the Spirit which is perfect love we would be a blessed people. If both men and women would renew their mind to what kind of mate God would have for them which is someone born again growing and increasing in there purpose to advance the Kingdom of God there would be no heart cry for a certain type of mate.
To use a checklist for looking for or choosing a mate that does not line up with the New Covenant (which is Christ) is carnal and this is why so many Christians choose wrong and end up in divorce.
Put your checklist away and look for Christ.
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The Result of the Curse from the Beginning
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Sep 8, 2007 12:34 pm
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Genesis 3:16
To the woman He said, I will greatly multiply your grief and your suffering in pregnancy and the pangs of childbearing; with spasms of distress you will bring forth children. Yet your desire and craving will be for your husband, and he will rule over you.
Here we see God telling Adam and Eve the result of the curse that was to come because of their sin. From the time of creation it was never met for man to rule over women. This was the result of the curse. They were made Equal.
Genesis 1:26
God said, Let Us [Father, Son, and Holy Spirit] make mankind in Our image, after Our likeness, and let them have complete authority over the fish of the sea, the birds of the air, the [tame] beasts, and over all of the earth, and over everything that creeps upon the earth.
This scripture says let them, not let him. So the curse was that he would rule over her but she would constantly be reaching and striving for equality with him because that is how she was created to be, equal with the man. Her striving comes from him not treating her as an equal; again this is the result of the curse.
Galatians 3:13
Christ purchased our freedom [redeeming us] from the curse (doom) of the Law [and its condemnation] by [Himself] becoming a curse for us, for it is written [in the Scriptures], Cursed is everyone who hangs on a tree (is crucified);
Through Jesus we have been redeemed from that curse. However many have not had their mind renewed from the curse. Many Christian men complain because their wife is not submissive, many women have a distorted idea of a godly wife. They think they have to ask their husband for permission before they can go ahead with things. That is not scriptural. As a single woman in my quest to be a godly wife to my future husband I began to change myself into this type of women when the Holy Spirit corrected me by taking me to the scriptures and showing what a godly woman is. He gave the revelation of the Five Fold Wife, (article posted on the Single but not Alone” page). But still I was trying to be that little wife that would jump at his command. That was short lived I never would have survived… I thank God for the Holy Spirit. I was off the mark big time.
Apostle Paul powerfully spoke on this in Ephesians 5:21 Be subject to one another out of reverence for Christ (the Messiah, the Anointed One).
This passage brings it all in balance for me. Through Christ we are equal. Christ came to restore us back to the way it was before the fall.
I will never ask my husband for permission as he will never ask me but I will ask him for his agreement or blessing as I expect him to do as well. And I will follow his counsel because he treats me with respect by submitting to me in my strengths and honoring me as his equal counter part. We will follow each other as we lead each other.
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Is Masturbation a Sin? By Pastor Darla Winn
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Aug 18, 2007 2:25 pm
144 Views
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Is masturbation a sin? Many preach that it is due to the man in…
Genesis 38:9-10
And Onan knew that the seed should not be his; and it came to pass, when he went in unto his brother's wife, that he spilled it on the ground, lest that he should give seed to his brother.
And the thing which he did displeased the LORD: wherefore he slew him also.
This scripture does not indicate masturbation, however when a man masturbates it is spilled and rendered unfruitful for multiplying. With this scripture seen in its proper context we can see it really has nothing to do with masturbation. If it did then we would have to pose the question “Is it wrong for a women to masturbate?”
As far as I can see the Bible is silent on masturbation in that it does not come out and say not to do it. However it does talk about sex out side of marriage etc. It doesn’t take a lightening fast mind to see that masturbation is sex, it is sex with yourself. Anything that has to do with using sexual organs to reach a climax is sex. So is it a sin? Only if you are not married. Sex was created by God first for a relationship builder between a husband and his wife… I Corinthians 7:9, then for expression and pleasure and then for procreation. If you are having sex with yourself it is unfruitful whether male or female. It is not building a relationship, or an expression of love to another, and certainly not procreating. However it does bring pleasure but it is only temporary and it is only for you. It is unfruitful. Sex is to be fruitful. So is it a sin? All sex is a sin outside of marriage. Homosexuality is a sin legally married or not. This is an entirely different issue.
Truthfully Spoken
Pastor Darla Winn
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Dumb Daters by Pastor Darla Winn
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Aug 18, 2007 2:21 pm
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Never do a baggage check (inspection). You may be wondering how to do a baggage check. One of the quickest ways to do this is in your first few conversations, while on a certain topic you can say things that will agitate someone who has issues. A lot of times just being yourself will cause issues in them to manifest. Other times the Holy Spirit will lead you to say certain things that will cause issues to manifest so that you can see the baggage out in the open for yourself. Then you can make the decision to try and help this person or move on. Most times they are not open for help but once in a while you find someone who really has a heart after God and will allow you to be a voice in their life. That’s a God thing.
Being a Voice
In being a voice you must speak the truth in love Ephesians 4:15. This gives grace (enabling power) to the hearer to hear what is being said. Ephesians 4:29 tells us to not allow our communication to be corrupt. If someone is speaking the truth to you in anger this will cause static, you will not be able to hear what is being said. Anger causes offense causing the hearer to hear wrong, which is corrupt communication therefore heart-guards go up resulting in no fruitful communication. To speak the truth in love simply means that you are speaking the truth for their sake not yours. Those who have issues will most always speak the truth to you with the attitude to set you straight it’s for their sake they are hammering you with what they think is the truth. When someone has issues they do not process the voice of the Spirit accurately nor your voice. They cannot discern your spirit, your heart etc… Don’t be a dumb dater and allow just anyone to speak into you or correct you. Most with issues correct you and they do the very same thing they are telling you not to do. As a single woman who has talked to several men over the last few years, I have learned to be selective. In 2½ years I have met only two men that I allow to be a voice into my life. This is because they walk their talk and they have proven to me that they have my best interest at heart. Rule of thumb, your pastors and leaders should be the main voice into your life this is for your protection.
Dumb daters:
Date someone because they have a good-looking shell. How can you know if someone is good-looking if you haven’t met his or her spirit? The shell is only glorified dirt – its not reality.
Don’t check to see who is driving the life of the one they are dating. It may look like the Holy Spirit is in the driver’s seat because they seem spiritual, they know a few Bible principles and may even be able to quote some scripture but that doesn’t mean the Holy Spirit is in the driver’s seat of their life. Come on now!
Causal dating – date-to-date because they are lonely: This can cause emotional instability and makes living a celibate life much more challenging.
Will go out with anyone who comes down the street like a dog in heat.
They have no idea of their own worth. When you see your worth in Christ you will be much more selective.
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Before we can choose the right mate we must first know who we are and what we are called to do … this involves knowing our destiny and then we have to know God’s goodness toward us so we can recognize that which is not goodness and veer from it. Our mate should have a heart toward us like God does. We should see the goodness of God coming toward us from them. DON’T’ SETTLE FOR LESS!!!
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False Love:
It is easy to misunderstand emotions and think you are in love with someone.
We gravitate to those who make us feel like we need to feel. The problem with that is what happens when they change and now don’t make us feel good anymore, we say we have fallen out of love with them… most likely you were never in love with them.
Dumb daters make dumb choices and end up in marriages that God had nothing to do with and then end up in divorce.
Be selective ya’all… don’t be a dumb dater (smile).
Keep in mind some people are single for a season while others are single for a REASON!
By Pastor Darla Winn
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The Five Fold Wife
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Aug 18, 2007 2:08 pm
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The Five-Fold Wife
By Pastor Darla Winn
What is a proverbs 31 woman? I hear single Christian men say they are looking for a proverbs 31 woman but they have no idea what a proverbs 31 man is. Are they so silly to think that God will send them something they have no idea how to honor, cherish, nurture and love like Christ loves the church?
Let’s look at the proverbs 31 man…
[[COLOR darkblue Proverbs 31:1-9
THE WORDS of Lemuel king of Massa, which his mother taught him:
What, my son? What, son of my womb? What [shall I advise you], son of my vows and dedication to God?
Give not your strength to [loose] women, nor your ways to those who and that which ruin and destroy kings.
It is not for kings, O Lemuel, it is not for kings to drink wine, or for rulers to desire strong drink,
Lest they drink and forget the law and what it decrees, and pervert the justice due any of the afflicted.
Give strong drink [as medicine] to him who is ready to pass away, and wine to him in bitter distress of heart.
Let him drink and forget his poverty and [seriously] remember his want and misery no more.
Open your mouth for the dumb [those unable to speak for themselves], for the rights of all who are left desolate and defenseless;
Open your mouth, judge righteously, and administer justice for the poor and needy.
Verse 23
Her husband is known in the [city's] gates, when he sits among the elders of the land
Verse 28
Her children rise up and call her blessed (happy, fortunate, and to be envied); and her husband boasts of and praises her, [saying][/COLOR],[/COLOR]
As we read about the Proverbs 31 woman we see that the foundation of her life was her devotion to God, her reverential fear of God, her heart of worship toward God. This permeated every part of her life and made her famous in the Bible. She excelled all of those before her… Miriam, Deborah, Hanna, Esther etc. because of her devotion to God. While many single men are praying for this type of women they have no idea how to treat a woman like this nor do they have what it takes to attract a woman like this. He can be no less then she is to attract her. He must become what he wants to get what he wants. You attract what you are… this woman had spiritual substance more than most Christian men, but yet they want someone like her. If the Proverbs 31 woman were to yoke up with some of the Christian men of today they would be unequally yoked.
Here is my description of the proverbs 31 woman:
She is a five-fold wife; she is first a Wife to her husband, in covenant with him, fully devoted to him, holding only him in her heart. She is second his Lover. She expresses the deepest part of herself to him as she makes passionate love to him. She lavishes herself on him. Everyday she thinks of ways to express herself to him. Shall I meet him at the door in lingerie or run him a hot bath and bathe him? Or maybe serve myself as dessert tonight? Or maybe I will suggest a walk out back in the blueberry field with me wearing very little under my clothes and make love to him on the blueberry stand or on the grass by the pond. She will create many ways to express herself to him so he will always feel loved by her, so loved he could never desire anyone else. She is third his Minister. She serves him not only in natural ways but also in spiritual. She seeks God for a word for him, something that will keep him encouraged on a daily basis. She prophesies instruction and direction to the point that he stays before the throne of God daily seeking God for confirmation. She is on the mark every time and this builds trust in him for her. He sees how she lives before the Lord and knows he can trust her with their life as she also trust him. She is four his Mother. She nurtures, and spoils him, and serves him. She feeds him the best… the finest meat, the best produce, his health is at the forefront of her mind. When he is down, she pulls him into her bosom and speaks words of life to him giving him instruction laced with the love of a mother. She is fifth his Sister and friend. She is his sister in that she always looks out for his best interest ready to teach and instruct in the affairs of his life. She is a sister who is his best friend, a trustworthy confidant.
The five fold wife goes full circle… before she is a wife she is a sister.
What guy can handle a woman like this? Is there any single Christian men who can treat a woman like this accordingly? Many Christian men have met women like this but did not recognize her because of where they are. Become like this and you will attract this and live happily ever after… (smile)
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The Origin of Sex
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Aug 4, 2007 2:53 pm
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In a wife submitting to her husband who is a minister and if she is a minister as well he would need to receive her not only into his life as his wife but also as a minister to him first and then to their congregation or whatever ministry they are in together. If she is five- fold she is certainly not there to look pretty and say yes honey all the time.
He will need to embrace the ministry in her and allow her to be that supply to him that God intends and then allow her to be that supply to the people they are ministering to as pastors, evangelist etc.
Men, there are all kinds of women who look at you and think "Wow, Yummy," and have tried to get close to you just because you are yummy. Majorities of singles have people who are drooling over them. But to find someone who can notice that you are yummy but move past it, and get excited about your destiny is hard to find. I have guys tell me everyday that I am desirable in some kind of way but not one of them is interested in my destiny. This is how I know right away that they are not my Boaz. This is also how you will know they are not your mates.
In choosing a mate we tend to choose people like us. We meet someone and get all excited about how much we have in common. I am the opposite. If we have too much in common then I know we are not right for each other. We need to choose someone who can make us stronger. In doing that we make the one we choose stronger as well. I most likely will not marry a man who has strength in administration and organization, coordination etc., because that is one of my greatest strengths.
In choosing a mate who I can be one with intellectually, emotionally, and spiritually he has to have strengths I don't have and our personalities have to fit and we both must be open for growth. With those things in place everything else will begin to join us together tightly on a daily basis. The oneness will become so great that the anointing that flows from us will be powerful. A couple is not powerful to advance the kingdom of God until they become one. As a couple moves toward oneness their anointing to minister as a team and individually gets greater. That doesn't happen when you make love the first time however it is the beginning. Becoming one is a process. Every time you make love you become less and less of two and more and more of one whole person. In this process you are dying to self and birthing a new person. Old things are passed away, behold all things have become new. You thought that was a salvation scripture didn't you? While it is, it is also a scripture for a couple who are getting married. Individually they die but in that death a beautiful person is birthed and two become one. I look forward to the death of myself as an individual so I can merge my life into my mate and be one person.
Marriage is two history's colliding, without the grace of God you can get killed in the collision.
Solomon chapters 4 and 5 is quite stimulating as it talks about her garden and drinking and eating of one another, I bet you thought the Bible was silent about oral sex... Chill out ya’all I am not saying that this is what it is talking about but it could be?
Anyway, one of the things that God has shown me is that most of His people who are married have never really experienced sex the way He created it to be experienced. They have not experienced the depth of it. It is supposed to be heavenly. I don't mean a heavenly experience I mean a trip to heaven, literally. The Holy Spirit should always be present. Listen, at the height of climax we should be in the spirit or the climax is just a natural thing. Sex God's way is not tapping the well it's tapping the spirit, like Moses struck the rock and the people received. Not only do you receive the physical release your body needs but it produces life in the person you are expressing love (life) to. The God kind of Sex is the greatest relationship builder ever created. The God kind of Sex is not just sexual organs coming together but eyes locking as you both leave the bedroom and enter the Holy of Holies of your marriage bed and experience the highest high there is, it's like no drug ever created. The God kind of intimacy creates a life changing anointing operating in your life as a couple.
I don't know what Baptist do at the height of climax but Pentecostals speak in tongues. I am serious!
In light of all I have just said this is why it is so important to chose the right mate. If you don't have the right mate your intimacy is more of physical release and pleasure and that is like building your house on the sand. Sexual expression is building your house (marriage relationship) on the ROCK.
Men ministers, if your wife is not able to be your minister she is not able to minister to anyone. You come first. When she proves she can minister to you then she is ready and you should, at that point, feel comfortable to release her to minister with you.
Another nugget: Any one can be a pleaser in the bedroom but pleasing should not be about you the pleaser. The greater a man can please his woman the more of a man he feels he is this makes his pleasing about him. But real pleasing is never about the person doing the pleasing. Pleasing is giving and it must be about the receiver. If the receiver is not responding correctly they will not receive all that the pleaser is giving.
Last nugget: Masturbation is having sex with your self and will delude your anointing. You can’t say you are celibate while practicing masturbation.
When your love for God out weighs your urge to merge you know you have put God first and you can do nothing but prosper.
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Single and Devoted
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Aug 4, 2007 2:50 pm
156 Views
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The word Single in the original language means “Whole.”
Singles need to learn submission before they get married. Submission to the Father, the word of God and respect towards others.
I Corinthians 7:35
Single people can attend to God without distraction. Single people need to spend this time of singleness being totally devoted to serving God.
Many spend more time looking for a mate to find fulfillment then serving God… This is selfishness – self-preservation. Some even dismiss God to find a mate. Baggage comes from trying to fulfill yourself while single.
Apostle Paul was single “whole.” Paul said he would that we would be like him, single and devoted.
We need to be busy about the Father’s business trusting Him to for a mate. We can express our desire for a mate and what we desire in a mate but then go on with serving God.
Those who dismiss God to find a mate are insecure. Don’t marry insecurity. You must discover who you are before you choose a mate. Those who are insecure have no real revelation of their identity.
When you spend time devoted to God this will keep you from sexual sin.
Your manifestation comes by busying yourself about the things of God.
Singleness will work for you when you devote yourself to the things of God.
YOU MUST HAVE STANDARDS. With no standards you will settle for anything.
Trust God for your mate… He uses relationships to show you, you are loved.
God rewards you for seeking Him not for seeking a wife, husband or riches etc.
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Sexual Revolution:
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Aug 4, 2007 2:47 pm
159 Views
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Stripped of Humanity:
The bed has been kicked out of church and church out of the bed.
Sex is worship; time to connect God back to sex. Sex is something we are before something we do.
Genesis 1:24-31
And God said, Let the earth bring forth the living creature after his kind, cattle, and creeping thing, and beast of the earth after his kind: and it was so.
And God made the beast of the earth after his kind, and cattle after their kind, and every thing that creepeth upon the earth after his kind: and God saw that it was good.
And God said, Let us make man in our image, after our likeness: and let them have dominion over the fish of the sea, and over the fowl of the air, and over the cattle, and over all the earth, and over every creeping thing that creepeth upon the earth.
So God created man in his own image, in the image of God created he him; male and female created he them.
And God blessed them, and God said unto them, Be fruitful, and multiply, and replenish the earth, and subdue it: and have dominion over the fish of the sea, and over the fowl of the air, and over every living thing that moveth upon the earth.
And God said, Behold, I have given you every herb bearing seed, which is upon the face of all the earth, and every tree, in the which is the fruit of a tree yielding seed; to you it shall be for meat.
And to every beast of the earth, and to every fowl of the air, and to every thing that creepeth upon the earth, wherein there is life, I have given every green herb for meat: and it was so.
And God saw every thing that he had made, and, behold, it was very good. And the evening and the morning were the sixth day.
Be fully human. Remove morals and you remove humanity. We are not animals.
Genesis 2:18-25
And the LORD God said, It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him an help meet for him.
And out of the ground the LORD God formed every beast of the field, and every fowl of the air; and brought them unto Adam to see what he would call them: and whatsoever Adam called every living creature, that was the name thereof.
And Adam gave names to all cattle, and to the fowl of the air, and to every beast of the field; but for Adam there was not found an help meet for him.
And the LORD God caused a deep sleep to fall upon Adam, and he slept: and he took one of his ribs, and closed up the flesh instead thereof;
And the rib, which the LORD God had taken from man, made he a woman, and brought her unto the man.
And Adam said, This is now bone of my bones, and flesh of my flesh: she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of Man.
Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh.
And they were both naked, the man and his wife, and were not ashamed.
The Hebrew name for man is Ish and woman Ah.
Regarding Sex; the church has taught us not to – the culture has taught us how to – this revolution is teaching us when, why and who to. Unfortunately the church has taught us to deny and suppress.
When making love inside of marriage it is a reflection of the character of God.
When you have sex you are becoming one flesh. Sex is not a result of the fall. God told man and woman to become one flesh, be fruitful and multiply before they sinned.
Gentlemen’s clubs and like places are dog kennels, only dogs go to such places looking for a mate. We are not animals, not hound dogs.
Mankind has gone from being fully human to being fully animals evolving to dogs.
The term (I got a piece or I got some) is animalish. People are not objects sexual or otherwise.
animals do not have spirits. They are not controllable when in heat. But we have a spirit that is created to be in control. When we yield to lust we are stripping our self of being fully human to being fully animal.
The four letter F word we are familiar with is a farming word. Origin: used as word to describe animals mating.
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Online Dating
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Aug 4, 2007 2:43 pm
211 Views
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How they prep you for sex:
In my experience with on line dating, you start communication on the computer and then graduate to the phone. I learned very fast that one can be anything they want to be on the computer or phone. In prepping you for phone sex a man will start out building what seems like a meaningful relationship. Weeks go by and the relationship builds. This may or may not be someone out of state but in a lot of cases it is. If a guy tells you distance means nothing to him I would proceed with caution. It could be he is looking for a phone sex partner. Once he establishes what seems like a meaningful relationship he will move you into something a little more intimate every time you talk. If this is a man out of state you can become vulnerable to him because now you are very fond of him and you want to see him, you long to be with him. Some have even been known to send money to a woman to help her for whatever need she has at hand. This opens her heart to him because if he sends money he must really care about me, so she thinks.
Some of the things they may say are: I was born to be married… I don’t do well single… I am looking for a wife… etc. Most women are looking for something meaningful and most guys no this so they say what they think the woman wants to hear. Also older women need to be ware that when a younger man contacts you it’s not usually because you are a knock out it’s because they believe, at your age, you know your way around a bedroom. Don’t be flattered by any guy desiring you sexually. The enemy wants to destroy you. Don’t ever take it personal when a man pays you a compliment. The only time you can take it personal is when you know he is a man of quality then you know his motives are right.
If you get a call late at night from one of your contacts most likely he is looking for phone sex. Be ware! Don’t be desperate to fall into the mud of online dating. You are not swine don’t let the hogs pull you in… Like anything online dating can be abused and you can get hurt just like in traditional dating. Online dating in itself is not bad you just need to be careful as in any kind of dating.
Know who you are in Christ and don’t compromise…. If you are celibate be celibate. True celibacy is no sex whatsoever. Note: Masturbation is having sex with your self. If you are masturbating you are not celibate.
Let your yes be yes and your no be no. When your desire for God outweighs your urge to merge you are walking in victory.
If you are on single’s sites I want to encourage you to raise the bar of sexual morality. Don’t be a dog… you are not a sex object. Be an instrument in getting sex out of the dog bed and back into the marriage bed where God intended it from the beginning.
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To link to this blog (bowflexteecia7at) use [blog bowflexteecia7at] in your messages.
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