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My Little Bit of Heaven
  
Most of you are going through the same or similar trials and tribulations as I am though your stories may be a little different we are all still in the same boat. My prayer is that my little bit of heaven will make your little bit of heaven just a little bit better. May the Lord richly bless you all, cheers.
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For Those Of You Who Think English Is Easy Feb 18, 2006 12:29 pm
201 Views
Can you read these right the first time?

1) The bandage was wound around the wound.

2) The farm was used to produce produce

3) The dump was so full that it had to refuse more refuse.

4) We must polish the Polish furniture.

5) He could lead if he would get the lead out.

6) The soldier decided to desert his dessert in the desert.

7) Since there is no time like the present, he thought it was time to present the present.

A bass was painted on the head of the bass drum.

9) When shot at, the dove dove into the bushes.

10) I did not object to the object.

11) The insurance was invalid for the invalid.

12) There was a row among the oarsmen about how to row.

13) They were too close to the door to close it.

14) The buck does funny things when the does are present.

15) A seamstress and a sewer fell down into a sewer line.

16) To help with planting, the farmer taught his sow to sow.

17) The wind was too strong to wind the sail.

1 Upon seeing the tear in the painting I shed a tear.

19) I had to subject the subject to a series of tests.

20) How can I intimate this to my most intimate friend?
2 Comments
Some Bizarre Warning Labels Feb 18, 2006 12:18 pm
184 Views
Somethings that I take for granted or just common sense apparently others don't as somebody has had to try these items for purposes that they were not intended for in order for these warning labels to be put on their products.

"This product not intended for use as a dental drill." -
Found on an electric rotary tool.

"Caution: Do not spray in eyes." - Found on a can of under-arm deoderant.

"Do not drive with sunshield in place." - Found on a card-board sunshield that keeps the sun off the dashboard.

"Instructions: Open packet, eat nuts." - Found on a pack-age of airline peanuts.

"Not intended for highway use." - Found on a 13-inch wheel for a wheelbarrow.

"Kills all kinds of insects. Warning: This spray is harmful to bees." - Found on a can of insecticide.

"WARNING: Contents flammable." - Found on a container of lighter fluid.

"Do not use orally." - Found on a toilet-bowl cleaning brush.

"Please keep out of children." - Found on a butcher knife.

"Warning: Do not use on eyes." - Found in the manual for a heated seat cushion.
0 Comments
Inspiring Footsteps Feb 17, 2006 11:04 pm
214 Views
I remember the days
You would sit me
On your lap
And share
So many wonderful stories
And words of advice
That even here tonight
After so many years
Since you said goodbye
To the world
All that you said
Still lingers so clearly
In my mind
And makes me cry
Because it's all
Just so amazing
And although I miss you
I know that you're watching me
And guiding me
From heaven
And hopefully
I'm making you proud
Because i'm giving it my all
To follow your inspiring footsteps
By sharing the
Love, hope, kindness and determination
You shared with me.
1 comment
The Winner Feb 17, 2006 10:35 pm
236 Views
I was watching some little kids play soccer. These kids were only five or six years old, but they were playing a real game - a serious game - two teams, complete with coaches, uniforms, and parents. I didn't know any of them, so I was able to enjoy the game without the distraction of being anxious about winning or losing - I wished the parents and coaches could have done the same.
The teams were pretty evenly matched. I will just call them Team One and Team Two. Nobody scored in the first period. The kids were hilarious. They were clumsy and terribly inefficient. They fell over their own feet, they stumbled over the ball, they kicked at the ball and missed it but they didn't seem to care. They were having fun.
In the second quarter, the Team One coach pulled out what must have been his first team and put in the scrubs, except for his best player who now guarded the goal.
The game took a dramatic turn. I guess winning is important even when you're five years old - because the Team Two coach left his best players in, and the Team One scrubs were no match for them. Team Two swarmed around the little guy who was now the Team One goalie. He was an outstanding athlete, but he was no match for three or four who were also very good. Team Two began to score. The lone goalie gave it everything he had, recklessly throwing his body in front of incoming balls, trying valiantly to stop them.
Team Two scored two goals in quick succession. It infuriated the young boy. He became a raging maniac - shouting, running, diving. With all the stamina he could muster, he covered the boy who now had the ball, but that boy kicked it to another boy twenty feet away, and by the time he repositioned himself, it was too late - they scored a third goal.
I soon learned who the goalie's parents were. They were nice, decent-looking people. I could tell that his dad had just come from the office - he still had his suit and tie on. They yelled encouragement to their son. I became totally absorbed, watching the boy on the field and his parents on the sidelines. After the third goal, the little kid changed. He could see it was no use; he couldn't stop them.
He didn't quit, but he became quietly desperate futility was written all over him. His father changed too. He had been urging his son to try harder - yelling advice and encouragement. But then he changed. He became anxious. He tried to say that it was okay - to hang in there. He grieved for the pain his son was feeling.
After the fourth goal, I knew what was going to happen. I've seen it before. The little boy needed help so badly, and there was no help to be had. He retrieved the ball from the net and handed to the referee - and then he cried. He just stood there while huge tears rolled down both cheeks. He went to his knees and put his fists to his eyes - and he cried the tears of the helpless and broken-hearted.
When the boy went to his knees, I saw the father start onto the field. His wife clutched his arm and said, "Jim, don't. You'll embarrass him." But he tore loose from her and ran onto the field. He wasn't supposed to - the game was still in progress. Suit, tie, dress shoes, and all - he charged onto the field, and he picked up his son so everybody would know that this was his boy, and he hugged him and held him and cried with him. I've never been so proud of a man in my life.
He carried him off the field, and when he got close to the sidelines I heard him say, "Scotty, I'm so proud of you. You were great out there. I want everybody to know that you are my son."
"Daddy," the boy sobbed, "I couldn't stop them. I tried, Daddy, I tried and tried, and they scored on me."
"Scotty, it doesn't matter how many times they scored on you. You're my son, and I'm proud of you. I want you to go back out there and finish the game. I know you want to quit, but you can't. And, son, you're going to get scored on again, but it doesn't matter. Go on, now." It made a difference - I could tell it did.
When you're all alone, and you're getting scored on - and you can't stop them - it means a lot to know that it doesn't matter to those who love you. The little guy ran back on to the field - and they scored two more times - but it was okay.
I get scored on every day. I try so hard. I recklessly throw my body in every direction. I fume and rage. I struggle with temptation and sin with every ounce of my being - and Satan laughs. And he scores again, and the tears come, and I go to my knees - sinful, convicted, helpless. And my Father - my Heavenly Father rushes right out on the field - right in front of the whole crowd - the whole jeering, laughing world - and he picks me up, and he hugs me and he says, "John, I'm so proud of you. You were great out there. I want everybody to know that you are my son, and because I control the outcome of this game, I declare you - The Winner."
3 Comments
Speaking The Word Of God Feb 17, 2006 8:45 pm
208 Views
God said: The words I have spoken to you are spirit and they are life (John 6:63).

When we speak the life-giving words of God from the Scriptures, we also impart life to people. On the other hand if we speak words from Satan (words that are contrary to God's words), we impart death, or harm, to people.

If you are sure you are acting in love and compassion, then by faith begin to speak God's words to people in their need. You will be amazed at what happens and how God backs up His own words.

If people need salvation, speak God's good news (gospel) to them (Mark 16:15).

If people need healing, speak God's healing words to them (Mark 16:16-1.

If people need a blessing, speak God's blessing to them (Numbers 6:24-26).

If people need peace, speak God's peace to them (John 14:27).

If people need comforting, speak God's words of comfort to them (2 Corinthians 1:3-4).

If people need a sense of self-worth, speak God's unconditional love for them (John 3:16).

If people need provision, speak God's promises of provision to them (Philippians 4:19).

The potential list is endless.

Speak, believe, and expect results. God says: So shall my word be that goeth forth out of my mouth: it shall not return unto me void, but it shall accomplish that which I please, and it shall prosper in the thing whereto I sent it (Isaiah 55:11).
0 Comments
I Could Have Been Feb 17, 2006 5:32 pm
172 Views
I have had a lot of schooling over the years for the different jobs that I have done but below were some jobs I could not do for the reasons listed, enjoy, hahahaha

I could've been...

A banker
But I was penny wise and pound foolish.

A doctor
But I didn't have time to practice.

A guitarist
But I preferred a job with no strings attached.

An ice-cream vendor
But I lost my cool.

An archeologist
But, I didn't want my career in ruins.

An athlete
But, there were too many hurdles.

A billiard player
But, nobody gave me a break.

A carpenter
But, I shelved the idea.

A chauffer
But, I didn't have the drive.

A comedian
But, my friends laughed at the idea.

A detective
But, nobody gave me a clue to get started.

A doctor
But, I got sick of it.

An Egyptologist
But, mummy objected.

A farmer
But, it wasn't my field.

A historian
But, I let bygones be bygones.

A juggler
But, things got out of hand.

A juggler
But, I dropped the idea.

A lawyer
But, that didn't appeal to me.

A lexicographer
But, I am a man of few words.

A librarian
But, they were fully booked.

A magazine editor
But, I didn't want to make an issue out of it.

A mathematician
But, I had too many problems.

A money lender
But, I lost interest in it.

A nuclear scientist
But, I didn't have the energy.

A shopkeeper
But, fate had something else in store.

A skipper
But, I missed the boat.

A sprinter
But, I was on the wrong track.

A swimmer
But, I had a stroke.
0 Comments
Praise The Mighty Name Of Jesus Feb 17, 2006 1:46 pm
225 Views
For some of you out there that have been with me from the beginning this will be old news so I apologize in advance. For those of you that have been on board since midstream this will be a little catch up for you. For those of you that are new this is my story up to date, hahahaha.
The ex and I have been having problems for many a year but I just hung around due to wanting to be with my youngest daughter in England. The ex did her own thing and I stayed at home with our daughter. Two years ago my oldest daughter was murdered and then I took on the care of my two grandchildren a boy and a girl.
As they started to grow up they were asking questions that normal children should not be asking so I prayed about it and decided to finalize the divorce with the ex and to bring the grandchildren back to the state.
There were several problems with this though. One and most important to me was that I would be leaving my youngest daughter in England. I was worried about her care as her mother is very good to her, that has never been a problem. The problem was that I have just been in her life every day from the time of her birth until I left England in October. The next problem was that where God was sending me I had never been. I didn't know the area or anything. God told me to trust Him and I did.
So I came back home to the USA. I was flowin into Gainesville, FL because that was the home of record and that was as far as the military was going to bring me back. This is the end of October of last year. God didn't want me in Gainesville for whatever reason so for now I had to work my way about 5 hours south of here. Anyway I needed to take a little detour so first stop was at the childrens great grandfather home. He needed help cleaning up damage that the hurricane had done a few weeks before we got over there so I stopped on the east coast of Florida to give him a hand with those chores. I was driving back and forth between the coast trying to help him and trying to set up my new life on the west coast.
Finally in January I am ready to start. I was now in an area that I was unfamiliar with, no I had just rented an apartment, no job, no car, no food, no furniture, no nothing.
I said God here I am. Right where you want me, I am waiting on you. So have I have tried to teach you over the time that I have been here. I started living life one day at a time.
I sat down, made a list of what I needed to do, and started working off that list.
I am in the apartment on the 3rd of January. Nothing in here but the children and me. My one friend here and his wife brought me over a computer to use, a chair to sit in, a small television and a van that I could borrow. OK now we are starting, hahahaha.
The children needed a place to sleep or rather something to sleep on so I went to the local Walmart and bought an air mattress, a sheet and some pillows. I slept on the floor and we were still living out of the suitcases.
And so the fun began. First day in the apartment, the local phone, cable and people like that came out to hook everything up. The children are happy they have cartoon network now, hahaha. I am on the phone or the computer most of the day. I am trying to get the children enrolled in the division of children and families on this coast, filling out resumes, filling out job applications, things like this.
To make a long story short now I move ahead a month and a half. All the hard work is starting to pay off. I have not one but two job offers. I will start one on Tuesday of next week and the other will be in one to three months depending upon how fast all the back ground checks come back. My furniture has finally made it from England. My friend has now given me that van that he told me I could borrow. We have a roof over our heads, food in our belly's, and the children are finally enrolled on this coast.
I have learned a long time ago that God's ways our not my way. I would have loved for everything to happen faster then what it did. God had reasons why it shouldn't. May the Lord bless each and every one of you the way He blesses me.

Praise the mighty name of Jesus.
3 Comments
God Is Like Feb 17, 2006 1:11 pm
206 Views
A fifth grade teacher in a Christian school asked her class to look at TV commercials and see if they could use them in some way to communicate ideas about God.

Here are some of the results:

God is like...
BAYER ASPIRIN
He works miracles.

God is like..
a FORD
He's got a better idea.

God is like...
COKE
He's the real thing.

God is like...
HALLMARK CARDS
He cares enough to send His very best.

God is like...
TIDE
He gets the stains out that others leave behind.

God is like...
GENERAL ELECTRIC
He brings good things to life.

God is like...
SEARS
He has everything.

God is like..
ALKA-SELTZER
Try him, you'll like Him.

God is like...
SCOTCH TAPE
You can't see him, but you know He's there.

God is like...
DELTA
He's ready when you are.

God is like...
ALLSTATE
You're in good hands with Him.

God is like...
VO-5 Hair Spray
He holds through all kinds of weather.

God is like...
DIAL SOAP
Aren't you glad you have Him? Don't you wish everybody did?

God is like...
the U.S. POST OFFICE
Neither rain, nor snow, nor sleet nor ice will keep Him from His appointed destination.
2 Comments
Be Still Feb 16, 2006 10:59 pm
217 Views
Many years ago a little boy was given a priceless possession: his deceased grandfather's gold pocket watch. How he treasured it. But one day, while playing
at his father's ice plant, he lost the watch amidst all the ice and sawdust.
He searched and scratched, becoming frantic, but no watch. Then he suddenly realized what to do. He stopped scurrying around and became very still. In the silence he heard the watch ticking.

"Be still and know that I am God ...."
1 comment
All I Needed To Learn From Life I Learn From Trees Feb 16, 2006 10:59 pm
241 Views
It's important to have roots.

In today's complex world, it pays to branch out.

Don't pine away over old flames.

If you really believe in something, don't be afraid to go out on a limb.

Be flexible so you don't break when a harsh wind blows.

Sometimes you have to shed your old bark in
order to grow.

If you want to maintain accurate records, keep a log.

Grow where you're planted.

It's perfectly okay to be a late bloomer.

Avoid people who would like to cut you down.

Get all spruced up when you have a hot date.

If the party gets boring or dangerous, just leaf.

You can't hide your true colors as you approach
the autumn of your life.

It's more important to be honest than poplar.
5 Comments
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