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A Few Don't
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Jun 16, 2007 3:33 pm
545 Views
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Don't grow too old for birthdays
An the fun things you used to do
Don't give up your dreams cause
You think they may not come true
Don't forget the sound of laughter
Nor the love seen in someone's eyes.
Don't trade your memories for pleasures
That in a thought filled moments just dies
Don't give up your zest for living
Saying you are much too old.
Is this what you feel, or is it
Something you've been told ?
There's a valley deep within us
Where there's an eternal Spring
Where there is no sound of sorrow
And the birds will forever sing.
Though your gait is not as steady
Now as once it used to be
And your vision's clouding over€ ¦
The things you used to clearly see
Do not let the weight of decades
Turn you into one with bitter gall
For with age there comes a wisdom
That's surely is a blessing to us all
Hold your years up like a banner
And wave it brightly in the sun
When folks tell you life is over
Tell them that it has just begun
Loneliness can never touch you
If you just refuse to allow it to
And in sharing love with others
God will give it back to you!
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Thought For Today
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Jun 15, 2007 11:34 pm
586 Views
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Treasure the effort and you'll move
effectively through it. Treasure the effort and you'll joyfully create solid, lasting value.
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Just The Old Man Rambling On Again
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Jun 15, 2007 11:28 pm
568 Views
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I was thinking about how a status symbol of today is those cell phones that everyone has clipped onto their belt or purse. I can't afford one. So, I'm wearing my garage door opener.
You know, I spent a fortune on deodorant before I realized that people didn't like me anyway.
I was thinking that women should put pictures of missing husbands on beer cans!
I was thinking about old age and decided that old age is 'when you still have something on the ball, but you are just too tired to bounce it.'
I thought about making a fitness movie, for folks my age, and call it "Pumping Rust."
I have gotten that dreaded furniture disease. That's when your chest is falling into your drawers!
I know, when people see a cat's litter box, they always say, "Oh, have you got a cat?" Just once I want to say, "No, it's for company!"
Employment application blanks always ask 'who is to be notified in case of an emergency' I think you should write, "A Good Doctor!"
Why do they put pictures of criminals up in the Post Office? What are we supposed to do, write to these men? Why don't they just put their pictures on the postage stamps so the mailmen could look for them while they deliver the mail? Or better yet, arrest them while they are taking their pictures!
I was thinking about how people seem to read the Bible a whole lot more as they get older. Then, it dawned on me, they were cramming for their finals. As for me, I'm just hoping God grades on the curve.
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The Ten Commandments of Marriage
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Jun 15, 2007 10:46 pm
537 Views
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Commandment 1.Marriages are made in heaven. But, so again, are thunder and lightning.
Commandment 2. If you want your wife to listen and pay strict attention to every word you say, talk in your sleep.
Commandment 3. Marriage is grand and divorce is at least 100 grand!
Commandment 4. Married life is very frustrating. In the first year of marriage, the man speaks and the woman listens. In the second year, the woman speaks and the man listens.In the third year, they both speak and the neighbors listen.
Commandment 5. When a man opens the door of his car for his wife, you can be sure of one thing: Either the car is new or the wife is.
Commandment 6. Marriage is when a man and woman become as one. The trouble starts when they try to decide which one.
Commandment 7. Before marriage, a man will lie awake all night thinking about something you say. After marriage, he will fall asleep
before you finish.
Commandment 8. Every man wants a wife who is beautiful, understanding, economical, and a good cook. But the law allows only one wife.
Commandment 9. Marriage and love are purely a matter of chemistry. That is why a wife treats her husband like toxic waste.
Commandment 10. A man is incomplete until he is married. After that, he is finished.
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One Liners For Today
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Jun 15, 2007 1:40 pm
549 Views
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If all of us had no faith in one another, we would all have to live within our incomes.
The person who agrees with everything you say either isn't paying attention or plans to sell you something.
Logic is the art of going wrong with confidence.
Trouble is the easiest thing in the world to borrow.
Child psychology is what children use to manage
their parents.
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Do You Know Your Artist?
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Jun 14, 2007 11:52 pm
576 Views
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A thief in Paris planned to steal some paintings from the Louvre. After carefully planning, he got past security, stole the paintings and made it safely to his van.
However, he was captured only two blocks away when his van ran out of gas.
When asked how he could mastermind such a crime and then make such an obvious error, he replied: "Monsieur, that's the reason I stole the paintings. I had no Monet to buy Degas to make the Van Gogh." (And you thought I didn't have De Gaulle to send this to you!)
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Honey Or Vinegar?
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Jun 14, 2007 11:44 pm
611 Views
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The preacher placed two identical jars on the table next to the pulpit.
He quoted 1 Samuel 16 The Lord does not look at the things man looks at. Man looks at the outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart.
“These jars came from the same factory, were made of the same materials, and can hold the same amount. But they are different,” he explained.
Then he upset one and it oozed out honey.
He turned over the other, and vinegar spilled out.
“When a jar is upset, whatever is in it comes out. Until the jars were upset, they looked alike. The difference was within and could not be seen. When they were upset, their contents were revealed.
Until we are upset, we put on a good front. But when we are upset, we reveal our innermost thoughts and attitudes, “for out of the abundance of the heart his mouth speaks.” Luke 6:45
What if someone tipped you over today? What would flow out??
Would you reveal the “honey” of grace and patience? Or the “vinegar” of anger and criticism? “Above all, love each other deeply, because love covers over a multitude of sins.” 1 Peter 4:8
Have a terrific day knowing that the one who upsets you may be just looking to see what is going to flow out of you as well as you find out yourself.
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Two Old Guys
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Jun 14, 2007 7:05 pm
555 Views
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Two old guys are pushing their carts around
Wal-Mart When they collide. The first old guy
says to the Second guy, "Sorry about that. I'm
looking for my Wife, and I guess I wasn't paying
attention to where I was going."
The second old guy says, "That's OK, It's a
Coincidence. I'm looking for my wife, too. I
can't find her and I'm getting a little
desperate."
The first old guy says, "Well, maybe I can help you find her. What does she look like?"
The second old guy says: "Well, she is 27 yrs old, Tall, with red hair, blue eyes, long legs, big bust, And is wearing short shorts. What does your wife look like?"
To which the first old guy says, "Doesn't matter, let's look for yours.!"
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Because I Am A Dad
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Jun 14, 2007 4:23 pm
538 Views
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I must hold the television remote control in my hand while I watch TV. If the thing has been misplaced, I'll miss a whole show looking
for it. (Although one time I was able to survive by holding a calculator.)
When I lock my keys in the car, I will fiddle with a wire clothes hanger and ignore your suggestions that we call road service until
long after hypothermia has set in. Oh, and when the car isn't running very well, I will pop the hood and stare at the engine as if I know
what I'm looking at. If another guy shows up, one of us will say to the other, "I used to be able to fix these things, but now with all
these computers and everything, I wouldn't know where to start."
When I catch a cold I need someone to bring me soup and take care of me while I lie in bed and moan. You never get as sick as I do, so for you this isn't an issue.
I can be relied upon to purchase basic groceries at the store, like milk, or bread. I cannot be expected to find exotic items like "Cumin" or "Tofu." For all I know these are the same thing. And never, under any circumstances, expect me to pick up a copy of "Cosmo" or "Better Homes & Gardens."
When one of our appliances stops working, I will insist on taking it apart, despite evidence that this will just cost me twice as much once the repair person gets here and has to put it back together.
I don't think we're all that lost, and no, I don't think we should stop and ask someone. Why would you listen to a complete stranger how could HE know where we're going?
You don't have to ask me if I liked the movie. Chances are, if you're crying at the end of it, I didn't.
I think what you're wearing is fine. I thought what you were wearing five minutes ago was fine, too. Either pair of shoes is fine. With the belt or without it looks fine. Your hair is fine. You look fine. Can we just go now?
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One Liners For Today
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Jun 14, 2007 12:26 pm
554 Views
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f u cn rd ths, u cn gt a gd jb n cmptr prgmmng
Few women are ever as young as they're painted.
Flashlight: A case for holding dead batteries.
For sale: antique desk suitable for lady with thick legs and large drawers.
Forget about World Peace. Visualize Using Your Turn Signal!
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