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My Little Bit of Heaven
  
Most of you are going through the same or similar trials and tribulations as I am though your stories may be a little different we are all still in the same boat. My prayer is that my little bit of heaven will make your little bit of heaven just a little bit better. May the Lord richly bless you all, cheers.
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Investment tips For My Friends Here At BC Oct 11, 2008 7:22 pm
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With all the turmoil in the market today and the collapse of Lehman Bros and Acquisition of Merrill Lynch by Bank of America this might be some good advice. For all of you with any money left, be aware of the next expected mergers so that you can get in on the ground floor and make some BIG bucks. Watch for these consolidations sometime in the future:

Hale Business Systems, Mary Kay Cosmetics, Fuller Brush, and W R. Grace Co. will merge and become Hale Mary Fuller Grace.

Polygram Records, Warner Bros. and Zesta Crackers join forces and become: Poly Warner Cracker.

3M will merge with Goodyear and become: MMM Good.

Zippo Manufacturing, Audi Motors, Dofasco, and Dakota Mining will merge and become ZipAudiDoDa.

FedEx is expected to join its competitor UPS and become FedUP.

Fairchild Electronics and Honeywell Computers will become: Fairwell Honeychild.

Grey Poupon and Docker Pants are expected to become: PouponPants.

Knotts Berry Farm and the National Organization of Women will become: Knott NOW!

Victoria 's Secret and Smith & Wesson will merge under the new name: Titty Titty Bang Bang
6 Comments
Are you concerned about losing your faith? ? Oct 11, 2008 6:23 pm
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Can anything ever separate us from Christ's love? Does it mean he no longer loves us if we have trouble or calamity, or are persecuted, or are hungry or cold or in danger or threatened with death? (Even the Scriptures say, 'For your sake we are killed every day, we are being slaughtered like sheep.') No, despite all these things, overwhelming victory is ours through Christ, who loved us.
And I am convinced that nothing can every separate us from his love. Death can't, and life can't. The angels can't, and the demons can't. Our fears for today, our worries about tomorrow, and even the powers of hell can't keep God's love away. Whether we are high above the sky or in the deepest ocean, nothing in all creation will ever be able to separate us from the love of God that is revealed in Christ Jesus our Lord. Romans 8:35-39 NLT
We are God's People, we are not babes in the woods and, no matter how it looks now, we are going to inherit this earth and rule it. The devil may be prince of this world, but the earth is the Lord's and the fullness thereof, and He will set up His kingdom and His people will be in charge of it.
4 Comments
How Do You Decide Whom To Marry? Lets Ask The Kids Oct 11, 2008 5:44 pm
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HOW DO YOU DECIDE WHOM TO MARRY?

You got to find somebody who likes the same stuff. Like, if you like sports, she should like it that you like sports, and she should keep the chips and dip coming.-- Alan, age 10

No person really decides before they grow up who they're going to marry. God decides it all way before, and you get to find out later who you're stuck with. -- Kristen, age 10

WHAT IS THE RIGHT AGE TO GET MARRIED?

Twenty-three is the best age because you know the person FOREVER by then.-- Camille, age 10

HOW CAN A STRANGER TELL IF TWO PEOPLE ARE MARRIED?

You might have to guess, based on whether they seem to be yelling at the same kids.-- Derrick, age 8

WHAT DO YOU THINK YOUR MOM AND DAD HAVE IN COMMON?

Both don't want any more kids.-- Lori, age 8

WHAT DO MOST PEOPLE DO ON A DATE?

Dates are for having fun, and people should use them to get to know each other. Even boys have something to say if you listen long enough.-- Lynnette, age 8

On the first date, they just tell each other lies and that Usually gets them interested enough to go for a second date.-- Martin, age 10

WHAT WOULD YOU DO ON A FIRST DATE THAT WAS TURNING SOUR?

I'd run home and play dead. The next day I would call all the newspapers and make sure they wrote about me in all the dead columns.-- Craig, age 9

WHEN IS IT OKAY TO KISS SOMEONE?

When they're rich.-- Pam, age 7

The law says you have to be eighteen, so I wouldn't want to mess with that.- - Curt, age 7

The rule goes like this: If you kiss someone, then you should marry them and have kids with them. It's the right thing to do. - - Howard, age 8

IS IT BETTER TO BE SINGLE OR MARRIED?

It's better for girls to be single but not for boys. Boys need someone to clean up after them.-- Anita, age 9

HOW WOULD THE WORLD BE DIFFERENT IF PEOPLE DIDN'T GET MARRIED?
There sure would be a lot of kids to explain, wouldn't there?-- Kelvin, age 8

HOW WOULD YOU MAKE A MARRIAGE WORK?

Tell your wife that she looks pretty, even if she looks like a dump truck.-- Ricky, age 10
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Tips For A Better Life Oct 11, 2008 4:39 pm
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Take a 10-30 minute walk every day, if you are physically able to do so.

Think of something that makes you smile and SMILE! It is a good
antidepressant.

Sit in silence for at least 10 minutes every day. Buy a lock, if you must.

Buy a digital video recorder. Tape your late night shows. GET MORE SLEEP.

Spend time with people over the age of 70 and under the age of 7.

Eat more food that grows on plants than food manufactured *in* a
plant.

Clear as much clutter from your house, your car, and your desk as you can. You will find yourself with extra energy for doing other things.

Realize that life is a school and YOU ARE HERE TO LEARN. It's amazing what that does to your perspective when problems crop up.

Make peace with your past so it can stop spoiling your present.

When you come to a crisis, gauge your response by this standard: "How much will this matter in five years?"

What other people think of you is NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS.

Get up. Dress up. Show up. No matter how you feel.

The best is yet to come. Believe it.

When you are really sick, your job won't take care of you. Your
friends will. Stay in touch!
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Why Trials?? Oct 10, 2008 4:39 pm
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“And he shall sit as a refiner and purifier of silver: and he shall purify the sons of Levi, and purge them as gold and silver, that they may offer unto the Lord an offering in righteousness.” Malachi 3:3.

Here is the process, the refining, purifying process, to be carried on by the Lord of hosts. The work is most trying to the soul, but it is only through this process that the rubbish and defiling impurities can be removed. Our trials are all necessary to bring us close to our heavenly Father, in obedience to His will, that we may offer unto the Lord an offering in righteousness. God has given each of us capabilities, talents to improve. We need a new and living experience in the divine life, in order to do the will of God. No amount of past experience will suffice for the present, or will strengthen us to overcome the difficulties in our path. We must have new grace and fresh strength daily in order to be victorious.
Everyone has his individual tests and trials in the drama of life, but the very same trial seldom comes twice. Each has his own experience, peculiar in its character and circumstances, to accomplish a certain work. God has a work, a purpose, in the life of each and all of us. Every act, however small, has its place.
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A newborn's conversation with God : Oct 10, 2008 7:18 am
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A baby asked God, "They tell me you are sending me to earth tomorrow, but how am I going to live there being so small and helpless?" God said, "Your angel will be waiting for you and will take care of you." The child further inquired, "But tell me, here in heaven I don't have to do anything but sing and smile to be happy." God said, "Your angel will sing for you and will also smile for you. And you will feel your angel's love and be very happy."
Again the child asked,"And how am I going to be able to understand when people talk to me if I don't know the language?" God said, "Your angel will tell you the most beautiful and sweet words you will ever hear, and with much patience and care, your angel will teach you how to speak." "And what am I going to do when I want to talk to you?" God said, "Your angel will place your hands together and will teach you how to pray." "Who will protect me?" God said, "Your angel will defend you even if it means risking its life." "But I will always be sad because I will not see you anymore."
God said, "Your angel will always talk to you about Me and will teach you the way to come back to Me, even though I will always be next to you." At that moment there was much peace in Heaven, but voices from Earth could be heard and the child hurriedly asked, "God, if I am to leave now, please tell me my angel's name." God said,"You will simply call her, "Mom."
2 Comments
The 90/10 Secret Is Incredible!! Oct 9, 2008 9:40 pm
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The 90/10 secret is incredible! Very few know and apply this secret. The result? Millions of people are suffering undeserved stress, trials, problems, and heartache. They never seem to be a success in life. Bad days follow bad days. Terrible things seem to be constantly happening. Theirs is constant stress, lack of joy, and broken relationships. Worry consumes time, anger breaks friendships, and life seems dreary and is not enjoyed to the fullest.. Friends are lost. Life is a bore and often seems cruel. Does this describe you? If so, do not be discouraged. You can be different!. Understand and apply the 90/10 secret. It will change your life! What is this secret? 10% of life is made up of what happens to you. 90% of life is decided by how you react.
What does this mean? We really have no control over 10% of what happens to us. We cannot stop the car from breaking down. The plane may be late arriving, which throws our whole schedule off. A driver may cut us off in traffic. We have no control over this 10%.
The other 90% is different. You determine the other 90%! How? By your reaction. You cannot control a red light, but you can control your reaction.
Don't let people fool you, YOU can control how you react!
Let's use an example.

You're eating breakfast with your family. Your daughter knocks over a cup of coffee onto your business shirt. You have no control over what just happened. What happens next will be determined by how you react.
You curse. You harshly scold your daughter for knocking the coffee cup over. She breaks down in tears. After scolding her, you turn to your spouse and criticize her for placing the cup to close to the edge of the table. A short verbal battle follows. You storm upstairs and change your shirt.
Back downstairs you find your daughter has been too busy crying to finish breakfast and get ready for school. She misses the bus. Your spouse must leave immediately for work. You rush to the car and drive your daughter to school. Because you are late, you drive 40 miles an hour in a 30 mph speed limit zone.
After a 15 minute delay and throwing $60 (traffic fine) away, you arrive at school. Your daughter runs to the building without saying good-bye. After arriving at the office 20 minutes late, you find you forgot your briefcase.
Your day has started terrible. As it continues, it seems to get worse and worse. You look forward to going home. When you arrive home you find a small wedge in your relationship with your spouse and daughter.
Why? Because of how you reacted in the morning.

Why did you have a bad day?
A) Did the coffee cause it?
Did your daughter cause it?
C) Did the Policeman cause it?
D) Did you cause it?

The answer is D. You had no control over what happened with the coffee. How you reacted in those 5 seconds is what caused your bad day.
Here is what could have and should have happened. Coffee splashes over you. Your daughter is about to cry. You gently say "It's OK honey, you just need to be more careful next time". Grabbing a towel you rush upstairs. After grabbing a new shirt and your briefcase. You come back down in time to look through the window and see your child getting on the bus. She turns and waves. You and your spouse kiss before you both go to work. You arrive 5 minutes early and cheerfully greet the staff. Your boss comments on how good of day you are having.
Notice the difference? Two different scenarios. Both started the same. Both ended different. Why? Because of how you REACTED. You really do not have any control over 10% of what happens. The other 90% is determined by your reaction.
Here are some ways to apply the 90/10 secret.
If someone says something negative about you, do not be a sponge. Let the attack roll off like water on glass. You do not have to let the negative comment affect you! React properly and it will not ruin your day. A wrong reaction could result in losing a friend, being fired, getting stressed out, etc.
How do you react if someone cuts you off in traffic? Do you loose your temper? Pound the steering wheel? (A friend of mine had the steering wheel fall off!) Do you curse? Does your blood pressure skyrocket? Do you try and bump them? WHO CARES if you arrive ten seconds later at work? Why let the blue car ruin your drive. Remember the 90-10 principle, and do not worry about it!
You are told you lost your job. Why lose sleep or get irritated? It will work out. Use your "worrying" energy and time into finding another job. The plane is late. It is going to mangle your schedule for the day. Why take out your frustration on the flight attendant? She has no control over what is going on. Use your time to study, to get to know the other passengers, etc. Why get stressed out? It will just make things worse.
You now know the 90-10 secret. Apply it and you will be amazed at the results!

“And this is the Father‘s will which hath sent me, that of all which he hath given me I should lose nothing, but should raise it up again at the last day.” - John 6:39
2 Comments
Children, I Love Their Innocence Oct 9, 2008 5:34 pm
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JACK (age 3) was watching his Mom breast-feeding his new baby sister. After a while he asked: "Mom why have you got two? Is one for hot and one for cold milk?"

MELANIE (age 5) asked her Granny how old she was. Granny replied shewas so old she didn't remember any more. Melanie said, "If you don't remember youmust look in the back of your panties. Mine say five to six ."

STEVEN (age 3) hugged and kissed his Mom good night. "I love you so much that when you die I'm going to bury you outside my bedroom window."

BRITTANY (age 4) had an earache and wanted a pain killer. She tried in vain to take the lid off the bottle. Seeing her frustration, her Mom explained it was a child-proof cap and she'd have to open it for her. Eyes wide with wonder, the little girl asked: "How does it know it's me?"

SUSAN(age 4) was drinking juice when she got the hiccups. "Please don't give me this juice again," she said, "It makes my teeth cough."

DJ (age 4) stepped onto the bathroom scale and asked: "How much do I cost?"

MARC (age 4) was engrossed in a young couple that were hugging and kissing in a restaurant. Without taking his eyes off them, he asked his dad: "Why is he whispering in her mouth?"

CLINTON(age 5) was in his bedroom looking worried. When his Mom asked what was troubling him, he replied, "I don't know what'll happen with this bed when I get married. How will my wife fit in?"

JAMES(age 4) was listening to a Bible story. His dad read: "The man named Lot was warned to take his wife and flee out of the city but his wife looked back and was turned to salt." Concerned, James asked: "What happened to the flea?"

TAMMY(age 4) was with her mother when they met an elderly, rather wrinkled woman her Mom knew. Tammy looked at her for a while and then asked, "Why doesn't your skin fit your face?"
4 Comments
Take A Child By The: Oct 9, 2008 3:30 pm
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Take a child by the hand,
and show him the way.
Lead a child each morning,
into a beautiful day.

Take a child by the mind,
and give him the strength;
to fight every challenge,
and go to great lengths.

Take a child by the soul,
and let God be known;
for it is by his mighty grace,
that so big they have grown.

Take a child by his sight,
and show him wonders galore.
Teach him curiosity
and the need to explore.

Take a child by his smile,
so beautiful and sweet,
and tell him of all the friends,
he will make and meet.

Take a child by his wonder
of the life all around.
Let him savor each flavor
and hear each new sound.

Take a child by his dreams
and say it's alright,
to follow those dreams
as far as he might.

Take a child by the heart
and teach him to love,
for there is no greater gift
from our Creator above.

And after your child has grown
and alone he now stands.
Watch and enjoy as he takes
his own children by their hands.
0 Comments
Pick-Up Lines And Comebacks For The Ladies Oct 9, 2008 7:35 am
158 Views
Man: "Haven't we met before?"
Woman: "Yes, I'm the receptionist at the VD Clinic."

Man: "Haven't I seen you someplace before?"
Woman: "Yeah, that's why I don't go there anymore."

Man: "Is this seat empty?"
Woman: "Yes, and this one will be too if you sit down."

Man: "So, wanna go back to my place?"
Woman: "Well, I don't know. Will two people fit under the rock?"

Man: "Your place or mine?"
Woman: "Both. You go to yours and I'll go to mine."

Man: "I'd like to call you. What's your number?"
Woman: "It's in the phone book."

Man: "But I don't know your name."
Woman: "That's in the phone book too."

Man: "So what do you do for a living?"
Woman: "I'm a female impersonator. "

Man: "What sign were you born under?"
Woman: "No Parking."

Man: "Hey, baby, what's your sign?"
Woman: "Do Not Enter"

Man: "How do you like your eggs in the morning?"
Woman: "Unfertilized! "

Man: "Hey, come on, we're both here at this bar for the same reason."
Woman: "Yeah! Let's pick up some chicks!"

Man: "I know how to please a woman."
Woman: "Then please leave me alone."

Man: "I want to give myself to you."
Woman: "Sorry, I don't accept cheap gifts."

Man: "I can tell that you want me."
Woman: "Ohhhh, you're so right. I want you to leave."

Man: "Hey, cutie, how 'bout you and I hitting the hot spots?"
Woman: "Sorry, I don't date outside my species."

Man: "Your body is like a temple."
Woman: "Sorry, there are no services today."

Man: "I'd go through anything for you."
Woman: "Good! Let's start with your bank account."

Man: "I would go to the end of the world for you."
Woman: "Yes, but would you stay there?"

Man: If I were to rewrite the alphabet, I would put U and I together.
Woman: Yeah?! Well, if I were to rewrite the alphabet I would put F and U together. Get my point?!
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