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Boundaries  

10/2/2006 11:22 pm

Last Read:
11/16/2006 9:09 pm

 I've seen some talk lately on some posts about Boundaries and thought that I would post some things that might be helpful to someone. I got this information from a Woman's Shelter that I stayed at for a while. There is no indication as to who wrote them.

Boundaries are not just a woman's problem they are a problem for men as well. We all need to be aware of these things not only in our own lives but in others as well so that we can help them to be overcomers.

Signs of Unhealthy Boundaries

Words in italics have been changed from the original by this blogger to meet the criteria of this site.

1. Telling all.

2. Talking at an intimate level on the first meeting.

3. Falling in love with a new acquaintance.

4. Falling in love with anyone who reaches out.

5. Being overwhelmed with a person - preoccupied.

6. Acting on first intimate impulse.

7. Being intimate for partner, not for self.

8. Going against personal values or rights to please others.

9. Not noticing when someone else displays inappropriate boundaries.

10. Not noticing when someone else invades your boundaries.

11. Accepting food, gifts, touch, intimacy that you don't want.

12. Touching a person without asking.

13. Taking as much as you can get for the sake of getting.

14. Giving as much as you can give for the sake of giving.

15. Allowing someone to take as much as they can from you.

16. Letting others direct your life.

17. Letting others describe your reality.

18. Letting others define you.

19. Believing others can anticipate your needs.

20. Self abuse.

21. Intimate and physical abuse.

Setting Boundaries

1. I will not allow anyone to physically or verbally abuse me.

2. I will not allow chemical abuse in my home.

3. I will not rescue other people from the consequences of their alcohol abuse, drug abuse, gambling or any irresponsible behavior.

4. I will not lie to protect anyone from the consequences of acting-out behavior that is destructive to me, to them, or to anyone else.

5. If other people in my life want to act crazy, that's their business. But I will not allow them to do it in front of me. Either they will leave or I will walk away.

6. I will not give up people and activities that are important to me because other people want me to.

7. I am not willing to take more than 50% of the responsibility for the problems in any relationship.
Ephesians 6:13 . . .and having done all, to stand

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